Moonstone Inn

Merry Christmas!!!!

Fri, 25 Dec 2009 07:28:11 GMT

It is officially Christmas over here! It's already been hectic with family and food preparations. Things are happening a little out of order due to new family dynamics. And for the first time since my brother was born 26 years ago, we will actually be leaving our house on Christmas day! This is really weird for me. I'm kind of looking forward to going to my cousins' house, though.

Now I do believe it is time for me to sleep so Santa can come (although the presents have been under the tree for the last few days - ah well). i was hoping to do a little writing to make up for not writing all day, but I'll just have to try to write on the trip up to my aunt's.

To everyone: Have a very Merry Christmas!

SOOOOOOOOM!!!! fist shake

Wed, 23 Dec 2009 17:46:15 GMT

*ala Kirk in Wrath of Khan*

So damn you, Soom. Faun babies? You suck. *sigh* Good bye life savings! You know you're keeping me from getting minifees, right?

Santa Comes Early!

Mon, 21 Dec 2009 22:02:55 GMT

After having expected this package all weekend, I was starting to get worried that it might not get here until after Christmas. I was practically stalking the mailbox all day. But they came! They came! I nearly ran out at the mail lady, squeeing all over the place as I took the package. Our little fee order has arrived! Liam will finally have his body. We're opening the box tonight at Malinda's dad's, so I'm really looking forward to that. I've got Liam's face plate ready, a set of clothes so he doesn't have to wear the elf ante's girly outfit, and a pair of sneakers. *cheer* I'm just so glad it's finally here!

Forgotten Castles - Chapter 17

Fri, 18 Dec 2009 05:53:32 GMT

Pivotal chapter here. I'm actually pretty pleased as to how this chapter came out. It's the last full one I've done so far. I'm still having a bit of an issue for future stuff, but I'm starting to get a better idea. Unfortunately, I don't think the font change I used to the letter will get seen properly on here, but I'll try my best.

Teensie bit of adult material. Konnel has some "alone time". Not explicit.

Dawn had yet to break when I awoke the next morning, but I could see the tell-tale signs of rising sun in the misty gray light outside my window. Looking about my bed, I could see I had risen first. Not overly surprising, as I’d always been an early riser. I was also pleasantly pleased by the absence of disturbing dreams. Company in bed had kept them away for another night. I did recall a dream about me and Jenny. I’m sure that helped attest to my cheerful mood.

In stretching, however, I noticed the distinct lack of movement in my left arm. I stared down at it, hidden below the sleeping form of Iris. Try as I might, I could not wiggle my fingers. The kid put my arm to sleep! Well that’s what I get for being nice, I guess. Arm trapped, I flopped back onto my pillow, grumbling. Plus, I had to pee. Figures.

Careful as to not wake either of the girls, I slowly dragged my dead arm out from under Iris’s head. It was like pulling a nail out of a wall with your bare hands. With one final yank, I got my arm out only to find myself sitting precariously on the edge of the bed. That final pull unbalanced me and I flopped onto the floor in a heap. Wex’s eyes opened and he watched my progress of standing up with one limp appendage with cool interest. He remained curled on Iris’s chest, and though he moved not a muscle, I felt him laughing at me all the same.

Damn cat.

Rubbing some life back into my arm, I noticed I had stepped on Iris’s pack in all my flailing about. I remembered how light the pack had been when I moved it yesterday, I couldn’t help wondering what might be in there, if anything at all. Could it be possible she carried around an empty pack? Something had to be in there. A thought came to me. What if she carried something that would tell me who she was? All I knew about her was her first name, her cat’s name, and that she’d obviously been on her own for some time. Perhaps if I could find something, anything, that could give me an indication where she came from I might be able to find her family – or at least what happened to them.

Of course, there was also the thought that anything in her pack might help in answering my question of not only who this girl was, but who I was. Too much was similar between our physical appearances to be a coincidence. If I found out who she was, could I find out more about myself?

Left arm still asleep, I sat down and maneuvered the pack with my legs, untying the drawstring bad with my right hand while I held the bag with my feet. I shook the pack a little to widen the opening so I could reach my hand in. Slowly I slid my arm into the opening, fingers stretched to their max to better feel for anything that might be in there. She could have something small tossing around, like a piece of jewelry or a marble or something. Something small and easily missed.

It took realizing I’d stuck my whole arm inside the bag before I stopped in my search. I stared at my arm. What the fuck? That…should not have been possible! The pack wasn’t nearly that big! As if it had stung me, I quickly removed my hand and stared at it, trying to determine if something had happened to my arm. Everything looked to be as it should. I wiggled my fingers to be sure. They moved appropriately. I picked up the bag and peered inside. Darkness peered back at me, no matter how I turned the bag to allow extra light to filter in.

More than a little confused, I stuck my hand in again, Wex making a soft growling noise in his throat behind me. I whipped my head around, startled. “Shhh!” Wex licked his lips disapprovingly. “I’m doing this to help Iris!” And myself as well. Wex didn’t exactly look like he agreed with me, but he stopped growling. He did not, however, stop staring.

With my second attempt at the pack, I nervously swept my hand around, trying to see if I could feel anything. Despite being somewhat larger on the inside than it seemed from the outside, it appeared to be completely empty. I deflated somewhat. After all that, having the pack practically eat my arm, I expected to find something. I couldn’t even find the edges of the space. It was as if it went on and on forever. I shivered at the thought.

Placing the pack back where I’d found it, I tied it up as best I could with one working arm. Deciding to leave the whole encounter behind me, I headed for the bathroom. The apartment was quiet. No one needed to be up for work yet, although Sebastian would probably have to be up soon. Dock workers got up at ungodly hours.

My arm stung with tiny needles by the time I got into the bathroom and shut the door. I shook my arm out frantically, knowing it would hurt, but that it would get the blood going through it quicker. The kid was definitely sleeping on the couch tonight. I don’t even know why I let her. Things had been going so well before she came and scared the wits out of me. I suppose it had been a good thing she didn’t show up any later than that. God knows what she might have seen. It’s not like I had a lock, or even a door, for my loft. No one could see without coming up the stairs and most everyone knocked or some how announced their presence before coming up. It had never been an issue before.

I’d been so close to having sex again, damn it! Now what with that halted and my dream about me and Jenny, things were starting to feel a bit backed up. Listening to the sounds of the apartment, I concluded no one else was up yet. I doubted anyone would need the bathroom for a few more minutes. I could take a little extra “me” time, right?

Checking to make sure I’d locked the door properly, I imagined Jenny naked. I imagined her perky boobs and pert nipples. I imagined her touching me. Closing my eyes so I could see it better, I imagined our first time together. Only a few minutes later everything came to a head. I reached out and held onto the wall as I finished. The wall kept me up until I could stand straight again. A little jittery, I cleaned up, deciding that perhaps I ought to do the whole morning thing, since I was up. I set about brushing my teeth, washing up and doing my hair. At least I’d be all ready for when Jenny woke up.

Feeling much better, I went to open the bathroom door. My heart nearly stopped as I almost walked into Sebastian, his hand raised in a first about to knock on the door. Guilty thoughts ran through my mind and a relief that he hadn’t knocked a few minutes earlier. “Uh, hey Sebastian.” Fuck, you could hear the guilt running through my voice. I tried to smile nonchalantly.

“Morning, Konnel,” he said slowly. “Everything okay?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Oh, yeah yeah. Fine.” Nerves tap danced through me. It reminded me of the time Matron Beatrice caught me jerking off in the orphanage closet.

He gave me a scant look, seemingly unsure about my answer. “Is Iris okay? I didn’t see her on the couch in the living room.”

“Iris? Oh! Right, right. She stayed with us – er, me. She stayed with me last night.” I shuffled my feet, really wanting to get out of there. I didn’t think Sebastian would be too mad if he knew what I’d been doing, but I really didn’t want the subject to be brought up.

Still a little confused by me, he said, “Oh, okay. That works. Um, can I get by?”

“Oh! Right! Sure.” I squeezed passed him. “Have a good day. I’m…I’m gonna head back to bed.”

He nodded. “Okay. Take Iris shopping today, alright?”

I began backing away. “Had every intention of it.”

“You need money?”

I shook my head. “I’m good, thanks.” Waving feebly, I finally made my escape back up to my room.

Iris’s eyes were open when I returned. Both hers and Wex’s eyes watched me as I sat back onto the bed. Iris looked rather lost, like she’d been waiting anxiously for me to return. The guilt and embarrassment built up and I was suddenly exceedingly glad it had been Sebastian and not Iris behind the bathroom door.

“Morning,” I said, trying to keep my voice from being too breathy, my heart still going a mile a minute from my encounter with Sebastian.

“Órnïngmó.”

Moaning, Jenny stirred next to Iris, her arms stretching over her head as she drifted into wakefulness. Through squinted eyes, she looked up at me and yawned. “You’re up early. What time is it?”

“Eight,” I told her, ignoring the me up early part. I was always up early, she just rarely ever saw that.

She groaned. “It seems earlier than that.”

I shrugged. “It’s winter.”

She stretched and yawned again. “I guess it’s time to get up in any case.” I saw her attempt to quickly comb away any bed hair with her fingers as she rose to a sitting position. It made me smile. Cute how she wanted to look good for me in the morning. I kind of liked the wild, morning frizz.

Iris shuffled a bit under the covers, turning her body onto her back and gazing up at Jenny. Jenny smiled down at her. “Sleep well, sweetie?”

Iris nodded, pulling playfully at Wex’s ears as the cat sat quietly and tolerantly on her chest. “You hungry?” Iris nodded again as a growl gurgled in accompaniment to her answer. Jenny giggled. “How about pancakes?” Iris’s little brow furrowed, her eyes turned questioningly to me.

“Hatwï réaen pancakes?” Iris asked me, pronouncing the new word carefully.

I scratched my head. “She doesn’t know what pancakes are?”

“You’ll love them!” Jenny assured her. “Too bad the stove’s not working or I’d make you some homemade ones, with cinnamon.” She sighed heavily. “I’ll have to resort to the frozen microwaveable pancakes. Would you like some bacon?” Jenny asked of me.

“Sure, I guess so.”

Jenny gave me a quick kiss as she climbed over Iris and out of the bed. “Okay, I’ll get breakfast started as soon as I take a quick shower and dress.”

“Sebastian’s in the bathroom.”

Jenny shrugged. “He’s usually pretty quick. By the time I get my clothes ready and head to the bathroom, he’ll be on his way out.” She kissed me again, longer this time. “Meet you guys downstairs, okay?”

I nodded and watched her go, entranced by the way her hips dipped every time she walked. Damn, she made even my pjs look sexy.

Iris pulled Wex off her chest and wiggled out from under the covers. She still had on her little dress from yesterday. I regretted we had nothing else to put her in before we headed out to buy her clothes. Not even Cora’s clothes would be small enough to fit her. Maybe if we could adjust one of Jenny’s sweater dresses…?

I pondered what to do with the kid, as Iris carefully climbed out of the bed and picked up her pack. Holding the pack reverently to her chest, she climbed back up and knelt down next to me, her serious expression making me concerned. When she didn’t say anything after a minute, I began to get worried. “Is everything okay?”

Her arms tightened around the pack and I could see her face tense up, tiny twitches in her eyebrows her only movement. I recognized that look. I’d had it myself plenty of times. Fear and sadness. I didn’t want to see that look on Iris. It didn’t belong on her. “Hey, what’s the matter?” I went to pet her head, but she ducked out of the way, whining a little.

“Iën avéhá ométhíngsa otén ivëgë óuyen. Tïén'sën éryvë mpórtantíth.”

I stared at her, wishing I knew what she was saying. I could only shake my head at her, letting her know I didn’t understand. “Important,” she said.

“What is?”

Almost in slow motion, Iris let her arms fall loose around her pack. Gently, she dropped it onto the bed and untied the drawstrings. I watched her confusedly. What about an empty pack was so important? Afraid to let her know I’d been snooping in her pack, I remained quiet, waiting for her to tell me herself. If I only I understood what she said.

Reaching a hand in, Iris screwed up her face in concentration and I couldn’t help but feel sorry for her. She had nothing to call her own but this small pack, or perhaps she didn’t realize she’d lost everything yet. My heart went out –

Iris pulled forth an ornate wooden box from the pack.

– and stopped in its tracks as I stared at what Iris held in her hand. “What the fuu-uudge?” I managed to cover up at the last second. Never in my life had I wanted so much to say the word ‘fuck’ until right now. ‘Fuck’ really seemed to cover my thoughts on the situation. If Iris hadn’t been a small, impressionable child, I’d have been cursing up a storm.

I stared at Iris. “But…” My vocal chords didn’t seem to be working, though my jaw did not have such problems, flapping away regardless of sound expelling. “But…that bag. It…it was…empty…” I scratched my head. “I swear it was…”

Iris held the box out to me insistently, her face still screwed up in that serious expression, one that told me she was just a step away from crying, but somehow holding it together. “Tystia áidsí oten ïvegá histú óten oméonésó Iën rústédtë,” she murmured as she handed it over.

Nervously, my hands shaking, I inched my fingers forward to take the box from her. My heart thumped wildly and I couldn’t quite bear to touch the box. I was afraid to touch it. In all my long life, I’d never experienced anything like what just happened. Hadn’t I just done a thorough search of her pack? I had been positive nothing had been here there, yet here Iris was, holding out a box I saw her pull from the pack with my own two eyes. I couldn’t believe my senses anymore.

Iris bridged the gap between us, letting the cool wood of the box fall into my shaking hands. Polished and smooth, it seemed almost fake – some kind of plastic replica. Except for the weight. Plastic would have been lighter, and what lay in my hands, though small, had a decent weight to it. Then there was the smell of pine. No plastic replica could smell that wonderful, like I’d stepped into a forest.

Strange, elaborate runes etched in delicate gold leaf decorated the edges and sides. I had no doubt, by the sheer beauty of it and its elegance, that the gold was real. My eyes traced the pattern the runes made, and I began to anticipate their pattern, something about how they were formed reminding me of something.

Little whorls of wood would seem to mar the otherwise perfection of the piece, except for that it gave the whole piece a handmade feel. Handmade, yes, but created by a master woodcarver. No doubt that this piece had not been cheap.

I stared back at Iris after examining the box, still somewhat afraid to open it. Iris said something I assumed to be “Open” as she mimed lifting the lid, in case I did not understand her. Still I hesitated. True, I had searched through Iris’s pack in the hopes of finding answers, but now to actually be faced with the possibility of receiving those answers – I suddenly wasn’t sure I wanted to know.

Pull it together, Konnel! I steeled up my courage. A little box would not frighten me. Taking a deep breath, I cracked open the lid. Sparks crackled through my fingers and up my arms, burying itself into the center of me. Surprised, I let go of the lid and it clattered back with a heavy snap. After a moment, I realized it hadn’t hurt, though I couldn’t convince my heart to slow its wild beating. It pulsed hard into my chest, a cushion of warmth blossoming around it and I pressed my hand to my chest expecting to feel the heat emanating from it.

What the hell had that been? Static charge? I doubted it. It had a similar feel to the trick Iris performed with the water, but not quite. A recollection of something else buzzed in my head, but I couldn’t place what. Only I knew I’d felt this before. Like a smell you know holds so much meaning, but the event had been long since forgotten, this feeling, this spark that surged through me and warmed my heart – I knew this.

Curiosity reigning over fear, I flung open the box’s lid, the spark leaving a trail of warmth all the way to my heart and deeper, searching, and leaving behind a pleasant tingle. I shivered in its aftermath, almost sorry to have the sensation leave me. Blinking a few times from the surprise, I gazed down into the box’s interior. Lined in dark velvet, the box contained a few separate folds of paper, each tied off with red silken ribbons and sealed with golden wax. Emblazoned in the wax was some kind of image reminiscent of the kinds I’d seen on official documents from the Colonial period in museums and text books.

A pile of green caught my attention away from the papers. Andrew Jackson stared back at me from the top of the significant pile. I grabbed the stack and flipped through it. Besides a few Andrew Jacksons and a good number of Ulysses S. Grants, I saw a ton of Benjamin Franklins.

“Holy shit!” I exclaimed, too surprised to sensor my words. There had to be thousands dollars in this stack! The bills were crisp and new, like they had just been minted and I ran my thumb down the side of the stack just to hear that thwish of new money.

What was a kid like this doing with such a large amount of money? “Did you know you had this?” I asked Iris, waving the stack at her. “You know you could have used this to pay for your sandwich. Hell, you could have had a whole meal at the Four Seasons!”

Iris glared at me. “Íën idden aypén!” Shoving her hand into her dress pocket, she removed a small pouch with a drawstring and took out a small coin from the bag. It glinted with copper, shiny and bright. She slapped the coin in the palm of my hand. With that, she sat back and crossed her arms, grumbling darkly under her breath.

Turning the coin over, I studied the face on the front of the coin. If I didn’t know any better, I’d have thought the girl pictured on the coin was Iris. Same face shape, shame eye shape, same nose… I stared up at Iris. Maybe I didn’t know any better. “Is this you?”

Iris nodded then removed a few more coins. The ones the same size and shape as the one in my hand all had the same face stamped on it. A few other coins flittered among the copper pieces, silver and gold ones of different sizes and shapes. Each of the others held the image of a different person. One the back of the coins had the same seal as on the letters in the box. Strange runic words circled the portraits on the front and the seal on the back. I licked my dry lips, starting to get an idea of where this was heading, but I still couldn’t see the final destination.

Removing one of the letters in the box, Iris handed the letter to me. “Read,” she said.

Taking the letter in trembling fingers, I set about breaking the seal and removing the ribbon. I unfolded the letter, the paper much thicker and coarser than I’d expected. Neat and tidy script filled the page, the flow of the words a bit reminiscent of the runes on the front of the box. Unlike the writing on the coins, however, the words were written in English.

“To the kind soul who has taken in our Iris,

Firstly, I must thank you for taking in our little girl. Just by the fact that you are reading this means the worst has happened and that neither my husband and I, nor our elder son, will be able to get back to our dear little Iris. That you were able to get the box containing this letter and open it means that Iris trusts you, and that you are a good person with pure intentions toward our little girl. Thank you for having such a kind heart in such dark times.”

I read the first paragraph with an increasingly heavy heart. Turning to Iris, I saw her hug Wex, her eyes downcast, almost as if she was unable to watch me as I read this letter. Poor kid. I had no idea what happened to her parents, but it was obvious they knew there might be a chance of death for them. The fact that Iris had given me this meant Iris believed them to be dead as well. No wonder she’d been so reluctant to give it to me. She didn’t want to believe they wouldn’t come back.

I was suddenly reminded of what she said to me in one of her few English sentences when we first met. She told me ‘bad people’ were looking for her. Could that have meant more than just the police we met? Could some ‘bad people’ have hurt her family? I swallowed hard, wondering what that meant should these bad people ever find her living here in our apartment.

“Iris is in fact now the only surviving member of the royal elven bloodline…”

I stopped reading at that point, the letter falling from my limp fingers. Had I not been sitting on the bed, I would have collapsed to the ground as I know my legs would not have kept me standing. There could be no way I read that right! Breathing shallow and fingers trembling, I picked up the letter and reread the sentence. “…member of the royal elven bloodline…”

Holy shit. I looked to Iris, noticing how her ear tips gracefully lifted up from her hair, delicate and fae. The eyes, the nose, her body frame, her narrow face. All so similar to mine. If Iris was elf… Oh God. I was elf? Elves…elves are real? “Aileen was right…”

Iris looked up when I spoke. “Elf? You’re…elf?” Iris nodded, pursing her lips and knitting her brow, jabbing an insistent finger at my chest. I swallowed. “Yeah. I am, too. I only just found out.” Face softening, Iris studied me, searching. “I never knew. You’re the first I ever met.” Sniffling a little, Iris curled under my arm and pointed at the letter, looking up at me. I nodded, taking a shaky breath. “Finish, yeah.”

At least now I knew why Iris had been so frustrated by the fact I couldn’t understand her language. She believed I should have known the language of our people.

Our people. I actually had a people. Pushing these thoughts to the back of my brain, I continued reading.

“Iris is in fact now the only surviving member of the royal elven bloodline; she is precious for more then just that fact, but her survival means a lot to her people. Please keep her safe, there are people that would hurt her and worse if they find her.

“Iris is exceptionally smart for her age.” Looking down at Iris, I could see how her parents would say that. “I am not just saying this as her mother, she is truly a young genius and constantly seeks to learn new things. However, and I do apologize, we did have a hard time teaching her what common she knows.” I blinked at the wording. Common? Didn’t she mean English? “She apparently does not like the sound of the language as much as she loves speaking elven. I am sure she will pick it up, she does understand most common though, she just does not speak it well.”

“We have also arranged for paperwork for Iris that works for your society.” I picked up an official-looking document I assumed to be the paperwork. Lines of English could be seen within the folds. “Her original elven birth certificate and other paperwork are in this box as well. The contact information for the man creating the paperwork has been enclosed as since we did not want her to be easily found, we did not give him her last name. You will need to provide one for her please. All of the paperwork has been paid for and any adjustments that might need to be made because of her slower aging, he can do that as well.

“As I understand, not many may know what an elf is since the elves and other magical races went into hiding after being nearly hunted to extinction millennia ago. An elf ages far differently then a human. She will be childlike in body for many more years and her aging will slow further once she begins to look more like a teenager.” Ah, fuck. I was going to start aging slower? How long was I going to live, anyway? “Her mind is well beyond her tiny stature though and she is extremely clever; she can explain more of elves to you.

“We have also enclosed money to aid in caring for Iris. We know it is not much, but it is hard for us to gather much money from your society.” I nearly snorted. Not much? They left more money than I’d ever seen in my life! My bank account, while considerable, didn’t contain this much.

“Thank you again for being so kind and watching over our little girl. Please, let her know her parents and big brother love her very much and want nothing more then for her to be safe and happy.

“Sincerely,

Elisandre Dumere”

Letter finished, I placed everything back in the box and closed the lid, setting it down next to me. I felt Iris’s eyes on me, judging my reaction I was sure. I didn’t know what to think or how to feel. I went looking for answers and I’d found them, though they’d been so much more than I expected them to be. Yet, for some reason, I wasn’t freaking out as much as I thought I ought to be. Perhaps I’ve always known on some level. I’d never really believed Aileen, but maybe I wanted to.

“Konnel?” A bit numb, I craned my neck down to look at Iris. She peered back up at me, almost unsure.

My arm still around her shoulders, I pulled her in closer, rubbing her arm absently. “It’s okay, Iris. I’ll take care of you. We…we got to stick together, okay?”

It seemed so unlikely. How is it that I help one little girl and she ends up being the one to have all the answers for me? All except one.

What happened to my own parents?

Although it had been a thought, I knew I was not Iris’s brother. A family portrait in the box showed a happy family in black and white and her elder brother was certainly not me. By the contents of the box, I could tell how much her family cared about their daughter and little sister. As much as I sympathized and pitied the girl, I envied her, too. What I wouldn’t give to have known that kind of love.

My mind still hadn’t been able to process the idea that I wasn’t human. It changed everything I knew about myself and I didn’t know how to come to this new identity yet. I’d need to give it some thought. At some point I should ask Iris about…about us. Elves.

But not now. “You hungry, Iris?” Iris nodded. “Okay. Why don’t we join Jenny.” Taking Iris’s hand, I led her from the loft, Wex trailing behind us.

Now to sleep as I should. Bad me.

Forgotten Castles - Chapter 16

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 16:23:49 GMT

I'm kind of eh about this chapter. I like a couple things. I think it just basically needs to be tightened up. It's not bad, just not great.

After Iris finished her bath, Cora brought her out, freshly dressed, and escorted her to the kitchen to find her a snack. It was getting on towards dinner and Sebastian would be home very soon. As would Jenny, and my heart fluttered a little at the thought, a soft smile playing on my lips. Tammy had the night shift tonight, and wouldn’t be home until around midnight.

Deciding tonight seemed like a pasta night, the four of us scrambled about the kitchen getting together the ingredients. Without the stove, we couldn’t make it properly, but there were plenty of microwaveable Italian dishes at our disposal. Fortunately Tammy had gone food shopping recently, and with the fear of another snowstorm keeping us from getting to the store, our cupboards were stocked with food as they had never been before. We even had fresh mozzarella and ricotta cheeses to add to the dishes. I don’t think our refrigerator had been so mold free in months.

Beer still seemed to dominate our drink department, but we had plenty of juice as well and Cora fortunately also loved juice boxes, so while we bustled around making dinner, I got one of those out for Iris. Curious about the way the straw went into the box, Iris happily sucked at her juice while watching us cook.

When we needed to, the group of us worked well together. There had been times where one or another of us would flake off in our duties – I’d even been guilty of that on occasion – but generally my roommates and I pitched in where needed. Justin grated cheese, Bobby got together some Italian bread, and Cora put the pasta in the microwave, while I got out utensils, napkins and plates. The kitchen may not have been big enough for all of us, but we moved well enough, staying conscientious of what everyone else was doing.

Cora shot me a couple of questioning looks as we worked, her eyes darting from me to Iris, and I could tell she wanted answers about some of the similarities between me and Iris. I just shook my head at her, indicating she should bring it up later. Or never. Never would be good.

The pasta was on its last step before being ready when we heard the front door open. We all kind of paused in our work to listen.

“Hey guys! Is that pasta I smell?”

Sebastian’s favorite meal was Italian, and I think we all hoped that by serving his favorite, he’d be in a better mood to decide upon Iris.

“Yup!” Cora called out to him. “It’s almost ready.”

“Great!” came the response. “I’m starved!”

Sebastian came around to the living room and stopped. Little Iris sat on the couch, happily swinging her feet and humming as she sucked down the last drops of juice from her box. I saw their eyes connect, Iris’s wide and innocent, Sebastian’s almost as wide with shock and confusion. Cringing, I waved feebly at him.

“Hey, Sebastian. Welcome home.”

Sensing my guilt, his gaze turned to me, his eyebrow raised in silent inquiry. The buzzer on the microwave went off. I jumped slightly and turned towards the kitchen. “Whoops, dinner’s ready!”

“Nah uh.” Sebastian crooked a finger at me. “You’re not going anywhere.” He pointed to the couch next to Iris. “Sit.”

The others in the kitchen suddenly busied themselves with getting dinner out, as if the pasta required all three of them to remove from the microwave. Why those dirty, rotten… Some friends. Feeling rather betrayed, I tossed them a dirty look – which they ignored – and went to sit next to Iris. Iris looked up at me, trust in her eyes, and handed me her finished juice box. She’d collapsed the box from her intense sucking. Her hands now free, she casually pet Wex on her lap, the cat purring madly, his eyes half closed in contentment.

Sebastian sent me another look in response to the cat and all I could do was shrug and smile sheepishly at him. Sighing at me, he got down on his knees in front of Iris and looked up at her, smiling. Both Iris and the cat watched him.

“Hi, there, sweetheart. Where did you come from?”

Iris scrunched up her face, seeming to ponder this, although I could tell she was having difficulty answering. Whether it was due to not understanding the question, or not knowing how to answer, I wasn’t sure. In all honesty, it was a question I would have liked to ask her as well. I may have found her in Central Park, but she didn’t seem to belong here. Her inadequate clothing only strengthen that theory.

Glancing at me, I could see in his eyes the questions Sebastian longed to ask me, but couldn’t in front of Iris. Turning back to Iris, he tried again. “What are you doing here, honey?”

At that, Iris spouted forth a whole story in her language, accompanied by lots of hand gestures. She pointed at me a few times, and Wex once or twice, even made a few growling faces and turned her hands into claws to simulate something nasty. I figured she must have been explaining our encounter with the police men. I chuckled, finding the whole performance rather adorable.

Sebastian’s jaw dropped. Having already started laughing, it made me snort to see his astonishment. He looked to me again, as Iris continued her story. “What…what is she speaking?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“It’s Japanese, dude,” Bobby said, walking out of the kitchen with two steaming plates of pasta in his hands. Cora and Justin followed after, each with two plates of their own. Cora handed a plate to Iris, Justin handed one to Sebastian, and Bobby handed his second plate to me. After placing her own plate on the coffee table, she bounced back in to the kitchen, asking for drink orders as she did.

“It’s not Japanese,” I told him.

“It sounds like Gaelic,” Justin said, shoving a forkful of pasta in his mouth.

I glanced at him. “Gaelic?”

He nodded, trying to swallow his bite. “Yeah, you know. Irish? My Mum’s from the mother country and she used to sing all these old Irish tunes that were sung in old Gaelic. Kinda has the same tone to it.”

Bobby laughed. “She’s got the red hair!”

“I don’t think she’s Irish,” I said.

“I don’t think she’s Irish, either,” Cora said, bringing in a stack of cups and a bottle of Pepsi. She gave me a meaningful look as she said it. I looked away, not wanting to answer her, even with my eyes.

Sebastian turned to me. “So where did she come from? I have a feeling this has something to do with you.” He raised a somewhat amused eyebrow at me. I grinned sheepishly at him again. “Does she know anything other than – for lack of a better word – Gaelic?”

“Tïen'sën ótnën Äelícgé,” Iris huffed at Sebastian. “Tïën'sen Lvënéth.”

Justin laughed. “She told you, Sebastian!”

I patted Iris on the head comfortingly, as she looked up at me with a wronged expression on her face. She grunted a little guttural whine and curled into my side. I gasped a little, not having expected it, and froze up a moment, unsure of what to do. Slowly I lowered my arm around her. Boy, that felt weird.

“She seems to understand English somewhat,” I explained to Sebastian, “but doesn’t really speak it well.” I then went into the full account of how I met Iris. Still leaning into my side, I felt every time she agreed with something I said, as I felt her little head nod.

Eliminating the part where I discovered her ears and my suspicions about what she was, I told the whole story from start to finish, from after I lost sight of the strange cloaked figure. I didn’t feel that part had been worth mentioning. I explained to Sebastian why I felt I needed to bring her home with me and gestured to the girl clinging to my shirt as further explanation – it was obvious she was attached to me. Why, only God knows.

After my story – some of which the others hadn’t heard yet, Sebastian nodded and sighed in what sounded like acceptance. I let out a relieved breath of air, positive Sebastian would let her stay.

“You know, you’ve put me in a very hard position, Konnel.” He stared at me intently and I swallowed at his gaze. “I can’t fault you for wanting to help this girl out, nor for wanting to bring her back and take care of her if she is truly on her own.” I could hear the ‘but’ coming a mile away. “But is this really the kind of environment a child should grow up in? I don’t know if it’s wise to keep her here.” Sebastian took one of Iris’s hands in his own. “And it’s not you, sweetheart. You seem like a good girl and I’d be happy to have you here.” He glanced back up at me. “We have to think of what’s best for her.”

“I have,” I said flatly. “Believe me, there’s no place else I can take her.”

“We’ve got room enough for a little girl like her,” Justin spoke up, placing his finished plate on the table.

“It’s not a question of room,” Sebastian argued.

Bobby tcked. “Come on, Sebastian! Look how attached the kid is to him! I doubt she’ll leave him even if you kick her out.”

“Iën'men ótnén éavïnglé ïmhen!” Iris said fiercely, glaring at Sebastian.

Sebastian sighed. “I’m not kicking her out. I’m just trying to impress upon you the consequences of this decision.”

The front door clicked open and shut. All of us seemed to freeze as Jenny came into the living room. “Mmm, is that pasta I smell?” We all watched her as she went into the kitchen. A moment later, she stepped back out again, staring at all of us. “Are we having some kind of meeting?” she asked, tentatively, gazing at each of us individually. “What’s going on?” Then her gaze fell on Iris. “Who’s the girl?”

Sebastian explained as Jenny rounded the couch to sit next to me. “Konnel found her wandering alone in Central Park. She doesn’t seem to have anywhere else to go, so Konnel wants her to stay here.”

Jenny gave me a quick kiss on the cheek in greeting, blushing a little as she did so. I coughed to cover up my own embarrassment. Ever since our first time together a few weeks back, we’d been a little shy around each other, a little unsure. Neither of us knew what that one moment meant for our relationship and we’ve been neglecting to talk about it. “So you rescued another girl needing your help?”

“I guess so.” I was becoming all too aware of my knight-in-shining-armor tendencies. “Iris, this is Jenny.”

“I’m Konnel’s girlfriend,” Jenny supplied when I chickened out on saying it myself. Why I couldn’t say ‘girlfriend’ to a little kid, I have no idea. She stuck out her hand for Iris to shake. “It’s nice to meet you, Iris.” Iris nodded back.

“You are going to let her stay, aren’t you?” Jenny asked Sebastian, whipping her head to plead at him. She took the plate of pasta Justin offered her, having gotten up to get dinner for her.

“As I was telling everyone, I didn’t think this to be the best environment for a child. Plus, with her language barrier…”

“Language barrier?” Jenny asked, looking to all of us.

“She speaks Gaelic,” Justin explained, “as near as we can tell.”

Jenny absently petted Wex who had curled up between me and Iris. He purred, content with her attentions on him. “I don’t see that as a big problem. I’m sure we’d manage.” She smiled at Iris. “She seems sweet.”

“Look, she’s not a lost puppy! You can’t just say she followed you home and decide to raise her. She needs more attention than a stray dog.”

“Utbën Íen ídden óllowfí imhen omehú!” Iris said in response to Sebastian.

Justin chuckled. “I think she’s decided she’s staying, whether you let her or not, Sebastian.” Iris nodded, clutching my arm tighter.

“She seems to have taken a real liking of you,” Jenny said softly, her eyes on mine. “Not that I could blame her.”

I felt everyone’s eyes on me, and I wished she wouldn’t give me that gentle expression when other people were around. That expression was mine only, and having others around to see it made me squirm uncomfortably. I could feel their stares burning into me, as much as I tried to ignore it. I swallowed back the embarrassment. “Yeah, well, she’s a good kid.”

“And she’s got a lot in common with you, doesn’t she, Konnel?” Cora piped up. All eyes turned to her, sitting cross-legged on the pink beanbag chair that matched her hair. Her eyes were on mine, though. I knew what was going on in her mind and I hardened my face, trying to tell her without words not to continue. In that intense stare I got back from her, I knew she wouldn’t heed my request.

Sebastian found his voice first. “What do you mean?”

“I noticed while I was helping Iris take her bath.” She continued to stare at me. Her expression turned to a silent question directed to me. Why did I not want her to continue? Did I know about her ears as well? Did I know what that meant? “She has the same pointed ears as Konnel.”

While everyone else glanced at each other in confused amazement, Cora and I continued to stare at each other. “You should have said something, Konnel,” she said to me. “Is she like a cousin or something? If she’s family… Well, if she is, Sebastian can’t send her off.”

“Holy shit!”

“Language, Bobby,” Justin warned.

“I can’t believe I didn’t see it. She does have pointed ears!”

“Is she really related to you?” Sebastian asked.

“What does this mean, Konnel?” Jenny asked.

Iris squirmed next to me, muttering the same thing she’d said before when Justin had been staring at her earlier. “I don’t know,” I admitted. “She’s not related to me.” I glanced down at her, into those strangely similar eyes. “As far as I know.”

“She’s like you, isn’t she?” Justin said, more of a statement than a question.

We shared a look. He’d seen. He’d known. It’s why he offered to help me talk to Sebastian. Cora stared at him from narrowed eyes. “You knew?”

“Yeah, I knew.” He glanced over to me. I don’t know whether he believed my age, or whether he even knew if he did, but he certainly knew what this meant for Iris, should she in fact be like me.

Sebastian sighed. “I would first like to clarify that I never said she couldn’t stay here.” All my muscles began to relax at that. “Especially since in the light of this revelation, the best place for Iris to be is with Konnel.” He stared at me with serious, intense eyes. “Can you handle that kind of responsibility?”

I glanced down at Iris, the trust in her eyes literally melting my insides. “I have to be.”

Sebastian nodded. “Alright then. It’s settled.” Cora cheered, kicking up her legs in jubilation.

Relief flooded through me. I really didn’t think Sebastian would kick Iris out, but I felt much better knowing his decision.

“Just make sure she doesn’t eat my cereal,” Bobby said, his threat having no power behind it.

“Shut up, jerk.” Bobby chuckled.

“So what does this mean, Konnel?” Jenny asked in a whisper. The guys had put on the television and Iris sat next to me, entranced by the images it showed. Not even Wex seemed to be paying attention to Jenny’s question, not that I’d expect a cat to pay attention to anything for long. “Are there others like you out there?”

I shrugged, not having actually given that much thought. My priority had been Iris’s care. Anything beyond that hadn’t been important enough to contemplate. Or more truthfully, I’d been afraid of the answer and had neglected thinking about it to keep from coming up with any. The idea that there might be others like me, besides Iris – I really didn’t know what to think about that. “I don’t know. Iris did seem excited when she saw my ears. Like she was happy to see them. Maybe she hasn’t seen anyone like us either?” I shrugged again. “Could be some really rare birth defect or something. I mean, did you see the preview for that Robin William’s movie? He ages quickly. Maybe there’s a reverse disorder for aging slowly.”

“I think that is a made up disease, though.” Jenny took hold of my hand. My skin prickled at her touch. “Wouldn’t you want to meet more like you?”

“I don’t know.” I paused, trying to find some feelings for the idea. Emotionally, I was numb to it. I had no particular feelings one way or another. “I don’t know.”

Curling into my arm, Jenny snuggled closer. “Well, whatever you need, with Iris or…or whatever. I’m here, okay?”

I nodded. She had no idea how comforting that was for me.

Iris fell asleep early. Her day had been rather full, so it wasn’t too surprising. Cora found a blanket for her to cover her up while we continued watching TV, lowering the volume so as to not wake the girl up. Wex had curled up next to her, the two of them rather sweet in sleep.

When Tammy came home, Sebastian took it upon himself to take her off aside and explain to her about Iris. After a while, a hand fell to my shoulder and I looked up to see Tammy’s smiling face, letting me know she, too, approved of Iris being there. Feeling more pleased, and drowsy, all the time, I leaned more into Jenny, enjoying her nearness and the scent of her.

Shortly after Tammy came home, my roommates began wondering off to their rooms. Bobby yawned and stretched. “It’s been one hell of a weird day. I think Iris had the right idea.” Justin followed shortly after, throwing a wave and a small smile to me and Jenny. Cora shuffled off slowly, dragging her feet, practically falling asleep standing up. Hand in hand, Sebastian and Tammy went off to their room.

Jenny kissed my cheek. “Shall we tuck in Iris and head to bed?”

My heart leapt at her tone. I nodded. Carefully we rose from the couch. Iris didn’t stir. While Jenny checked to make sure her blanket covered the girl completely, I pulled the electric heater closer to where she lay. I hoped no one would trip on the chord during the night, but I couldn’t let her freeze.

Together, Jenny and I tiptoed up to my loft. I pulled out my electric heater and hit the switch to turn it on. Within moments, the coils reddened and heat poured forth into the little space. I shifted it to point at the bed. Jenny turned down the covers as I fiddled with the heater.

“What’s this?” Jenny pointed to the hot water bottle I left between the sheets a little while ago, during my last bathroom break.

“It’s a hot water bottle. We used to use them a lot when I was a kid at the orphanage. It heats the sheets before you go to bed.” I removed the bottle and placed it on the floor at the foot of my bed. “Not many people use them anymore. Not when you can just heat the whole room.” I shrugged. “I still have one, though. Comes in handy at times like these.”

Jenny nodded. “I’ve never seen you use one.”

“Well, you haven’t exactly been staying with me the passed few weeks.” I glanced down and shuffled my feet, running an uncomfortable hand through my hair.

“True.”

Jenny’s feet shuffled next to mine. My gaze trailed from her feet up her legs, halted around her chest for a moment, and ended locked on her eyes. She stood leaning on one foot, head tilted and eyes searching. Was she guilty for not staying with me? Was that look asking for my forgiveness for not being able to? I couldn’t quite read her.

So I kissed her.

She kissed me back, throwing her arms around me and pulling me close. A zing of electricity went through me and a happy ‘woo hoo!’ resounded in my head. Then she pulled away.

“I didn’t change into my pjs.”

I blinked at her, dumbfounded. “Did you need pjs?”

She giggled and slapped my arm playfully. “Silly.” She must have thought I was kidding. “I’ll just borrow one of yours.”

I watched her scrounge around my bottom drawer, focusing mostly on her cute little ass, protruding out as she bent over in her search. A wicked little grin formed as I watched. Nice!

Jenny’s head swiveled back at me, though her posture didn’t change. “Are you staring at my ass?”

The grin refused to disappear. “No.”

Her eyes narrowed and her lips pursed, though there was an amused curl to the corner of her lip. “Pervert.”

I chuckled as she swiped a pair of my flannel pants at me. I ducked out of the way, falling on to the bed a little more heavily than I intended. Jenny stood back upright, holding a flannel buttoned down top and a matching bottom. I never actually used the top – it had come as a set, and I liked the bottom. The top I used mostly as a throw over for other outfits. Not exactly my thing for sleepwear.

“Mind if I change here?”

The grin only grew. “Uh, no. By all means.”

Throwing me another of her “pervert” looks, she began the time honored girl undressing dance – the kind only girls had the ability to do. I watched in awe as she skillfully pulled her bra out from her sleeve. With the shirt fully buttoned, she pulled the flannel over her head and down her torso, covering her sweater. Wiggling ever so slightly, she maneuvered her arms out of the sweater sleeves and into the flannel sleeves. They popped out of the sleeve holes like some kind of magic trick. Then she pulled her sweater out from underneath the flannel shirt and up over her head. The sweater fell to the floor by her bra. The flannel shirt being long and covering her butt just so, she wiggled out of her jeans and hopped into the matching flannel pants without once showing the color of her panties.

Finished, Jenny turned to me with a triumphant smile on her face. I could only stare, slack jawed in awe. Though she showed nothing of what lay hidden underneath all that clothing, Jenny’s performance had been the most erotic striptease I had ever witnessed. Damn.

Jenny saw my look at giggled, settling herself next to me. “Aren’t you going to change into pjs?”

I thought about what might become painfully obvious should I remove my jeans. “Uh, no, that’s okay.” I removed my sweatshirt to the t-shirt underneath. “See? I’m good.”

Jenny giggled again, and crawled across my bed, shoving me from behind. “Get changed, silly.”

I leapt up quickly and pulled out another of my flannel pjs. Trying to think calming thoughts, I focused all my energy on swapping pants as fast as I could, keeping my back to her as I did. Fortunately, the situation wasn’t too dire, and my boxers were loose. As a last ditch effort, I ran to turn off my lights before climbing into bed with Jenny.

She snuggled into me. “See, now isn’t that better?”

“Uh, yeah.”

We kissed a bit, everything having calmed down nicely before Jenny could notice. At least, she didn’t say anything if she did. After a few minutes, she shifted out of reach, settling onto her pillow. I sighed inwardly and settled into my own.

“What do you plan to do with Iris now?”

The question caught me off guard. “Huh? Wha- oh, I don’t know. Take care of her. Whatever she needs.” I paused for a moment. “She needs winter clothes.”

Jenny nodded. “I saw that. You want me to come with you when you go? I can be very helpful in picking out girl’s clothes.” She smiled at that.

I grinned. “I’m sure. Yeah, I could really use it. I’ve no idea what I’m doing.” I sighed, rubbing my temples to keep the overwhelmed feeling from getting to me.

“I can see why you couldn’t do anything else, though.”

I nodded, though I didn’t think it had quite been because of the similarities between us physically, though that helped of course. There had just been something about Iris. Something special. I couldn’t place it. I felt drawn to her, and it wasn’t some kind of attraction, like how I felt about Jenny – which would have been creepy and weird if it had been – but something else. Something within me wouldn’t allow me to leave this girl alone without me.

“Do you think she’s older than she looks?”

“Yeah, I do.” I pondered her age a moment, trying to remember myself as a child. How old had I been when I looked like that? Five or six? “Maybe six years old? Seven at most. But I don’t think she’s any younger than five.”

“That’s still young. Poor thing, out there on her own. How long do you think she’d been out there?”

“I don’t know. Few weeks a most? And even that long is a bit of a stretch, considering the blizzard. I can’t imagine her being out there that long without freezing.”

Jenny snuggled back into me again. “Well, what matters now is that she’s here and she’s safe. All of us will help look after her.”

“Thanks,” I whispered, kissing her forehead.

I heard her breath go shallow and then her lips were on mine. Slowly I slid a hand under the bottom of the shirt. Her hands did the same to mine, so feeling I’d been given the green light I explored her, Jenny following suit, each touch building up steam.

Something buzzed in the back of my head. A little warning signal. It buzzed and itched until I wanted to scratch at it. Jenny halted, sensing something was wrong with me and in that halt I felt it – another presence in the room.

As I turned my head, I heard a tiny voice say, “Konnel.”

I nearly jumped out of my skin. Standing next to my head, eyes drooping with sleep, her pack dragging from her one hand and Wex dangling from his armpits from the other, was Iris. She rubbed her eyes and yawned. “Konnel, oúyën éftlë émén llaën lóneath.”

“Hey, are you okay? Did you have a nightmare?” Without answering me, Iris dropped her pack on the floor and climbed over me to the center of the bed. “Ooof! Hey, Iris! What –”

Iris smiled sleepily up at Jenny, waving slightly. “Óodgä ightná.”

Jenny smiled. “Good night, honey.”

Iris curled into my side to fall asleep, Wex clawing at the sheets at the foot of the bed to join her. “Oh come on! Iris, no! Wex, back!” I gestured with my arm, pointing back down the loft stairs. “You sleep in the living room. You don’t sleep here.” Iris ignored me, having all ready fallen asleep. I moaned. “Iris…”

“I think she can stay here for tonight, don’t you think?” Jenny said.

I groaned. Damn it. Here I thought I was about to get a repeat of that night a few weeks ago, and Iris went and cockblocked me. I flopped onto the pillow in defeat. Apparently I had no idea what I’d gotten myself into.

Jenny kissed my cheek. “There are other nights.”

Yeah, sure. Other nights. As I looked down at the sleeping face of Iris, I couldn’t stay mad. Kind of annoying how cute the kid was. I had a premonition this wouldn’t be the first time her cute would keep me from being mad. Damn it. I began to understand why God made children adorable – so we didn’t kill them when they annoyed us.

Point to you, old man.

Before long, all three of us – and the cat – had fallen asleep.

Forgotten Castles - Chapter 15

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 05:18:25 GMT

I've written nothing all day. Besides being distracted with Christmas shopping and Warcraft (yay for having fixed the patch they used to fuck up my computer!), I'm kind of at a point I'm not sure what I'm writing next and whether I really need to write out every moment from Iris's introduction. Do I really need to write out everything that happens while they're out shopping? Or the entire dance crew session? Or every time Bobby whips out more drugs and gets beat up by Iris? (Which is going to be a funny scene to write, let me tell you.)

*sigh* I'll figure it out. Even if I have to take out the extra scenes later.

I blinked.

I blinked again.

I remembered to breathe and stared down into the tub. Steam began to rise from the water’s surface as the heat of the tub met the cold air of the bathroom. Okay…that was weird. Did that mean the heat had turned back on? I stared at Iris, her face a mixture of pride and anticipation. Slowly I removed my hand from the water, the sleeve dripping onto the bathroom rug as I’d neglected to roll it up before it got dunked. Still watching Iris, I rose to my feet, her little face turning down in a disappointed frown.

Breaking eye contact with the girl, I turned on the faucet of the sink, twisting the knob towards hot. After running it for a few moments, the water never got any warmer than ice. My mind blank, I turned off the faucet and gazed back at Iris. She watched me intently, shoulders slumped as she stared. I had the sudden feeling like I’d done something to fail her. Unsure of what to say, or how to ask the question I needed to ask but could not come up with the words for, I cleared my throat and knelt back down with Iris.

“Uh…” My brain stuck. Skipping like a scratched record, my mind continuously played the word “how” over and over again. I couldn’t seem to kick my brain over the scratch to the rest of the question. With great effort, I pushed through my confusion, taking a deep cleansing breath and could finally speak.

“What was that? How did you do that?”

Iris, gazing up at me with wide, honest, unflinching eyes, tilted her head to the side. I thought she looked almost sorry for me. Was I being pitied by a child? “Ägícmë.” Seeing my confusion, she repeated, “Magic.”

I swallowed. “Magic?” Iris nodded. Not able to wrap my mind around it, I shook my head, rubbing my eyes as if I thought that by doing so I would open them to find the laws of reason had not just flown out the window. “That’s…that’s not possible. I mean, magic doesn’t exist.” This conversation had a familiar ring to it. I was suddenly reminded of another little girl, not so different from the one sitting before me – their coloring might have been different, but that determined look in her eyes was the same.

I didn’t believe then, and I had a hard time believing now, no matter what those eyes wanted me to believe. Just because something like why I aged slowly and how Iris turned the water warm couldn’t be easily explained, didn’t mean it was magic. If everything that was hard to explained happened because of magic, then things like computers and televisions would be the works of magic, instead of the electrons and science we know them to be.

Yet what Iris did seemed so much farther removed from electronics. Even by conventional science, I couldn’t explain it. There had to be an explanation, though, it was just out of my understanding.

It had been a long time since I believed anything based on faith alone. Is this one of your tricks, Old Man? An honest to God miracle? Just for that, I didn’t want to believe in it.

Iris glared at my disbelief, hands on hips and repeated, “Magic,” with more force behind her word. Seeing her so resolute, I couldn’t bring myself to sneer at her. Even if my own faith was in the crapper, it didn’t give me the right to shit on hers. So she believed she’d done magic. Let her.

“Okay, okay. It’s magic.” By the way she stared at me, I think she knew I was patronizing her a little. She huffed at me, but seemed to let it go.

Almost ignoring me, she began to fiddle with her dress. Warmth flooded my face. I sincerely hoped I wasn’t needed for this part. I didn’t think I was ready for dealing with a naked little girl. “Uh, so you’ll be all right to take a bath on your own, right?” Quickly I bustled around the bathroom, collecting the things she’d need for a bath – shampoo, conditioner, soap, washcloth, towel. At least she wasn’t old enough to need a razor. Then again, neither was I, even though puberty had already begun for me. Not that I was looking forward to growing hair in any case.

I laid out all the accessories for her, giving her a rushed explanation of each, Iris watching me in faint interest, her undressing halted as I went over each. She nodded when I’d concluded. Deciding it was time for me to leave, I headed for the door.

“Konnel, thank you.”

The words were spoken haltingly, and with her strange accent, but said very sincerely. I turned back and smiled at her, a different kind of warmth filling me from her gratitude. “No problem, kiddo. I’ll, uh, wait for you outside,” I said, thumbing back at the door, “incase you need anything. Okay?”

She nodded. “Oh-kay.” The word came out as almost two separate words. Kind of cute.

With that I left her alone to bathe, leaning heavily against the door behind me. For some reason, my body felt heavier than usual. The whole water heating thing had taken a lot more out of me than I expected. My legs seemed to have turned to jelly. I stared down at them, almost entranced. How odd.

As much as I hated to admit it, I had freaked out more than I thought. Somehow I managed to keep it mostly together while I was in there with Iris – God, I would have had to kill myself if I’d gone berserk in front of her!

Part of me still couldn’t completely disbelieve. I remembered what it felt like as it was happening, the strange electricity pumped into my soul. Much as I’d like to disregard the whole thing as a crazy happenstance, I couldn’t. It felt real. Something real had happened in there and I couldn’t squash that feeling no matter what my logical brain said.

I pinched myself to make sure I wasn’t sleeping. It hurt a little. Kind of a stupid thing to do anyway, I mused, a bit angrily. Not like the sleeping mind couldn’t imagine the pain. Besides, I didn’t think I was sleeping. The feel of my heart against my ribs was enough of a convincer for me.

It scared me, too, a bit. So it seemed, in any case. Turned my whole view of the world upside down. As if the idea of her being whatever I was hadn’t been enough of a shocker for one day. I was left not knowing what to think anymore. God, I hated change.

So intend was I on my thoughts that I didn’t realize Justin had entered the hallway until he stood next to me. I sensed his presence before I saw him. He watched be quietly, a concerned frown marring his features.

“Everything okay?” I just nodded. “Is she already taking her bath?”

I nodded again. “Yup.”

“Oh. I didn’t hear you warm up the water.”

“Didn’t need to.”

Justin blinked in surprise. “Really? I didn’t hear the radiators come back on. Is the water running hot now?”

I shrugged. “It doesn’t seem to be.”

Justin frowned. “Then…”

I shook my head. “I don’t know. Maybe…maybe it coughed up a bit of extra heat in an effort to kick start the boilers again. Maybe they’re fixing it right now, but all it could manage was one heated bath tub.” I shook my head again, searching frantically for answers that I knew weren’t there. “I just don’t know.”

“Hmm.” He leaned against the wall next to me. At sixteen, he wasn’t quite a foot taller than me, but I knew he’d get there. “Well, at least Iris will get her bath.”

“Yeah.”

I couldn’t tell him what I saw, what I felt. Everything seemed just so unreal. Or maybe it was because it was more real than anything. As good a buddy as Justin had always been, I didn’t think he’d believe me. I still didn’t believe me. Better to just let sleeping dogs lie, leave it alone and pretend it didn’t happen. I was good at that.

“You know we still need to talk.”

I finally looked up at Justin. “What do you mean?”

“Iris. She seems like a good kid. Can we really keep her here, though?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I just…couldn’t leave her at an orphanage. I’ve been through that, Justin, and…” I heaved a heavy sigh. “She needs me. I can tell she needs me. Maybe you’re right, and this isn’t the place for her, but what else could I do?”

Justin let out a breath. “I don’t know, man. I agree you couldn’t have left her, though. No one, least of all a kid, should be out alone in the cold.”

“No kid should be alone,” I added softly, the years of experience filtered through the words.

He smiled sympathetically and patted my shoulder with a gentle squeeze. “Very true. Of course, it’s got to be taken up with Sebastian. I’ll vouch for her with you. Can’t imagine him kicking her out, either.”

I nodded. “Thanks.”

“Oh, and before I forget –”

“Konnel!”

A small pink blur came tearing down the hall and hugged me around the waist. Cora’s cotton candy hair tickled my nose as she hugged me.

“ – Cora’s home.”

I glared derisively up at Justin. “Gee, thanks for the warning.”

“Bobby was telling me about the girl. Is she in the bathroom? When do I get to meet her? Do you think she needs help?”

“Whoa, Cora!” Justin carefully pried the girl from my person. It had been a good thing I was leaning against the door as I’d have been bowled onto the floor otherwise. “Slow down. Let Konnel breathe again before you start asking him questions.”

I rubbed the back of my head, a bit tender from when it smacked into the door from her enthusiastic embrace. “Yes, she’s in there, and you can meet her when she comes out.”

“So she’s staying here, right?” She bounced animatedly. It was tiring to watch her sometimes. Jesus, the girl had more energy than the Energizer Bunny. “It’s going to be so great to have another girl around here. Things will be even with you guys! Plus, it’ll be nice not being the youngest. How old did you say she was?”

“Uh, I didn’t. And I don’t know how old she is. She hasn’t told me.”

Justin turned to me. “What do you think? Three? Four at most?”

I opened my mouth, but no sound came out. How could I explain my theory on her age? As it was, I doubted he believed me about mine. “Uh, yeah. Near as I figure.”

“Awww!” Cora cooed. “I love the little ones!”

“Really? I thought you tormented small children,” Bobby said, entering the hall. “I always figured you for the kind of kid who tore off her dolls limbs and made other children watch, while maniacally cackling at their terror.”

Cora huffed and rolled her eyes. “No, I only terrorize big children.” She grinned wickedly at him.

Bobby turned to the two of us. “I think she just insulted me.” Justin and I could only snicker. “Oh, shut up, you two!”

“Don’t you think a three year old is a bit young to be taking a bath by herself?” Cora asked, ignoring Bobby and glancing up at me. “I mean, kids can drown in the tub.”

I shifted uncomfortably. “Well, uh…” I had nothing to respond to that with. She’s probably not three and is probably old enough to bathe herself? That required a lot more explanation than I really wanted to do. “I mean, she’s a girl…” Lame response, idiot.

Cora rolled her eyes. “Big baby. You can ogle boobs but you can bathe a little kid who doesn’t have any?”

“Come on! It’s weird.” I shifted more under her unblinking gaze. “It’s too pervy even for me.”

Cora sighed and shook her head, an air of disappointment about her. “Our resident pervert has a limit…” Then she shrugged. “Well, I’m a girl, so it’s not big deal for me.”

She pushed at me to get at the door knob. “Hey!” I pushed back. “Maybe you should just wait until she gets out.” Why the hell was I suddenly so nervous for her to meet Iris? After all, Justin and Bobby had. Then again, I was feeling anxious about them seeing her again, too. I was starting to get nervous over them noticing certain things about her. I really wanted to keep that stuff to myself. Questions were just going to make me more uncomfortable than I already was. Somehow I felt if I could supervise their contact with her, they wouldn’t notice things like her eyes or her ears. I didn’t want her to become a specimen under a microscope – nor did I want their notice of those things to bring about notice of the same things on me.

I knew I was being an idiot, but I couldn’t help it.

Cora pushed at me again with more force. For a little kid, she had quite a lot of strength. “You won’t be happy if you go in later to find her floating upside down in the water.”

I glared at her. “Gee, thanks for the image.”

She grabbed the door knob and twisted, pushing open the door. It knocked me off balance, as I was still leaning against the door, and I had to scramble to keep up right. “I’ll be back!” She slammed the door behind her, ramming the door into my butt.

I rubbed my ass as I glared at the closed door, grumbling to myself. Placing my ear to the door, I hoped to listen in to whatever was going on inside.

“Hey, you okay, Konnel?” Justin asked. “You seem a bit agitated.”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I grumbled, starting to feel really idiotic for keeping Cora from going in. Surely my friends wouldn’t make as big a deal of it as I feared they might. I was just being stupidly paranoid.

With my ear to the door, I could hear everything Cora and Iris said, plus a lot of water splashing in the tub. The guys, curious themselves, joined me at the door. Feet shuffled against the tiles as Cora walked to the tub.

“Hi,” her voice reverberated across the tiles. “So you’re Iris?” A slight pause accompanied this question. “Konnel was telling me about you. My name’s Cora, I’m one of his roommates. Heard you told off Bobby. He deserved it, I’m sure.” Laughter followed, a two part harmony with two different pitches.

Bobby glared from where he stood on my right. “Hey!” He growled, but I knew there was no true venom in it. “She’s askin’ for a beating.”

Justin raised an eyebrow at me from where he stood at my left. Yeah, right, it said. We both knew Bobby was putty in Cora’s abusive little hands.

“Oh hey, you need some help with that?” Giggles tinted Cora’s words. “I suppose that’s one way to do it.” More splashing. “You don’t want to drown. Cute face, though.”

I made a face. What the heck was she talking about?

“I’m sure we have a cup or something around here…Ah! Here we go! Just tilt your head back and close your eyes.” Water trickled softly into the tub. “Wasn’t that easier? If you ever need help with it again, call me.” A slight pause. “I mean, you are staying, right? ‘Cause really, we could use another girl around here. Those guys are helpless.”

I heard Iris giggle at that. “Íén'men tayingsé.”

“Whoa! Bobby wasn’t kidding when he said you spoke in a strange language! But you do understand English, right? …Good. Okay, now turn your head to the right, so I can get the side of your head.” More water trickled down.

“Hey, that’s strange.” I felt my heart skip a beat with a painful thump at hearing that. “Those are like Konnel’s.” My pulse flew with rough beats. Why I should be so terrified of her finding out about Iris’s ears, I had no clue, but I knew that’s what she’d discovered. “Are you guys, like, long-lost siblings or something? Your hair’s a different color, though.”

“Ëwen'eren ótnén íblingssú,” Iris responded sadly after a moment. “Ymén róthérbí…”

I heard a soft gasp, but from whom I couldn’t be sure. “Oh, don’t cry! I didn’t mean to make you cry!”

“Iën'men ótnén ryíngcï,” Iris said a bit defiantly.

Hearing Iris sound so sad tugged at my heart. I had no idea what she said, but it hurt to know she hurt. Not for the first time, I wondered what happened to her family. Where were they? Were they looking for her? Or were they…? I swallowed. I wondered if she knew what happened to them or if like me wondered about them. Cora had mentioned about siblings – what if she has a sibling. A brother or sister. Iris had a family, of that I was sure. Alive or not, I began to feel a little jealous of the kid for having known her family, as I was sure she did.

However, for whatever reason, she – like me – had been separate from that family, either permanently or temporarily. I wondered if knowing made the separation hurt that much more. At least I didn’t know what I was missing.

Softly I knocked on the door, still too wimpy to actually go in. I practically rolled my eyes at myself. Jeez, it’s just a little girl. Not like she’s gonna bite you. “Hey, how’s it going in there? Everything all right?” Though now that I thought about it, there were plenty of little children who bit people. I didn’t think Iris would be one of them, however.

“Everything’s great, Konnel. Iris and I are getting along just fine. Isn’t that right, Iris?”

“Ësyën!”

Cora laughed. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

From the corners of my eyes, I could see Bobby and Justin next to me, each of them wearing a frown, eyes downcast. It was the most serious expression I’d ever seen Bobby wear in all my time knowing him. Justin’s eyes stared at me, so I turned to meet his gaze. “That poor kid. What do you think happened to her family?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. And she doesn’t seem to know enough English to really tell us.” I sighed. “In any case, I don’t have the heart to bring it up and hurt her by making her remember.”

“Sebastian will let her stay, right?” Bobby asked, an almost worried tone in his voice. “I’ll help you vouch for her if Sebastian has any issues.” That was surprising. Even with her abuse of him, it seemed Bobby wanted to help her, too. Maybe he had a softer spot for kids than I thought he did.

“I can’t see him throwing someone who needs help out,” Justin said. “Especially someone so young.” He chuckled. “At least no one’s allergic to cats.”

Forgotten Castles - Chapter 14

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 21:21:49 GMT

So I just noticed my dragons died. Ah well. I don't think I'm attentive enough to be doing stuff like that. Hell, I've killed a bansai tree, and that takes a lot of neglect to kill. lol

I'm starting to think my story is going to take way longer to finish than I thought. New stuff I need to add to it keep coming up. I already know of some stuff I need to add in flashbacks from previous sections. I did just get to a very poignant scene for the story, but for now, I have this chapter.

“Hello? I’m home!”

I called out hesitantly, taking off my coat and hanging it on the rack. I waited as Iris removed her pack and took off her dingy, oversized coat, shoving her mismatched gloves in the pockets. The first thing I had to do, I thought resolutely, was to get her a new coat, gloves and hat. In no way should a kid be wandering around in that piece of crap. I picked up her pack to move it out of the way and found it to be much lighter than I expected it to be. Must not have much. In fact, it felt pretty empty. I took her coat from her, seeing her struggle to reach the lowest hook on the rack. As I hung it up, I could see it wasn’t actually dirty, oddly enough, it was just very old and faded, much like her gloves.

Iris smoothed out the skirt of her dress, having been wrinkled a bit from being underneath the coat for so long. The dress, unlike the coat, looked to be made of quality material and trimmed in some elegant embroidery in a similar style to the embroidery on her knapsack. Grossly inadequate for the weather, it seemed to be more of a summer or spring dress, the material light and airy, and very fine. Amazing she hadn’t frozen to death before now. Her coat barely made up for what her dress lacked in warmth.

The little hands that smoothed the dress had once been neatly manicured, though were now a bit chipped and worn. Long fingers for such a little kid, thin and graceful and more like a small person than a child. Much of Iris’s frame spoke of a smaller person as much as a young girl.

She shook her hair frantically, trying to remove hat hair and static. The bright red strands stuck out a bit at odd angles after her attempt, poofing a bit with frizzy static. It was shorter than I expected, hanging nearly to her shoulders, but cut in a cute, almost pixie-ish style. Now that her hat was off, I could clearly see her little points of her ears sticking up through her hair, tiny sparkling studs glinting in the hallway light.

So strange. On the one hand, she wore a worn coat, seemed to be homeless and stole food to eat, while on the other hand, she carried an impressively designed backpack, wore an expensive looking dress, kept herself clean and had impeccable manners and in her ears were what I believed to be real diamonds. Even taking away the odd language and pointed ears, she presented quite a conundrum.

“Hey, Konnel, you going to stay out in the hallway or what?”

Justin. Must have just gotten off work. “Uh, yeah. Just a minute.” Now that her coat was off, Iris shivered violently in the freezing apartment. When the hell were they going to fix our heat? In the mean time, we all kept heavy sweaters and blankets for warmth. My sweater hung on the rack next to my coat. I handed my sweater to Iris, figuring I’d get another from my room. It was big on her, the sleeves sticking out over her hands comically. She flopped them a bit in trying to find her hands and I nearly snorted. I helped by rolling up the sleeves, though she still looked so little in it. Kinda cute, though.

I kicked off my boots, still wet from the snow, and slipped into a pair of warm slippers I kept on hand by the door. Iris watched me and did the same with her tiny shoes. Hmm, need to get the kid slippers, too. I saw Jenny’s woolen bootie slippers next to mine. She wouldn’t be home from work for a little while, and though Cora’s slippers might have been a better fit, I knew better than to incur the wrath of that one by using her stuff. Nasty temper that kid had.

The booties flopped around like clown shoes on her, and Iris wiggled her feet every time she lifted them, probably just to watch them slosh around. Or maybe to help her take a better step. She had a smile on her face, but a determined air about her, as if trying not to fall in her huge feet. I was almost tempted to pick her up again to keep her from tripping.

“He’s probably checking himself out in the mirror again,” came Bobby’s voice back in response.

I grimaced. Figures Bobby would be home when I brought Iris in. Besides myself, he was the most perverted and foul person living here. Not exactly kid friendly. Cora could handle him for though she may be twelve in body, her mind was far older. Iris…well, I didn’t know how Iris would do with him.

I had just taken Iris’s hand to lead her into the living room when Justin poked his head through the doorway. I jumped back in surprise, smacking his shoulder. “Jeez, man, you nearly gave me a heart attack!”

“Sorry, thought I’d come to see what was taking you so long.” Justin had cocooned himself inside a large fluffy yellow blanket. Several moth-eaten holes dotted throughout it making him look like a human Swiss cheese log. At least I couldn’t see his breath on the air. The mini electric heaters must have been doing something, though it was hard to tell. I was beginning to regret taking off my coat.

Justin’s head swiveled and glanced down at the tiny figure next to me. I braced myself for whatever comment he might make. His jaw slacked open and he looked back at me, staring with narrowed eyes, eyebrows nearly non-existent in his hairline. “What’s with the kid?” he asked, voice low so the girl wouldn’t hear.

“Hey, Konnel, did you bring up one of Mrs. Mendelson’s cats?”

I looked down, and sure enough, Wex was no where under foot. Crap.

Justin glanced back at Bobby and then to me. "There's a cat, too?"

“I can explain,” I said briefly to Justin, pushing my way passed him and into the apartment. Iris trotted after, calling out for Wex.

“Is that Cora?” Bobby asked from the living room. “Figures she’d bring one of those beasts upstairs.”

Bobby stood by the computer monitor, trying to shoo a hissing Wex at his feet. I heard a cry behind me and Iris zoomed forward, rushing to pick Wex up and cuddle him to her. Bobby stared.

“What the fuck?!”

“Language, Bobby,” Justin warned, coming up next to him. “She’s younger than Cora.”

“Well what the f-heck is she doing here?”

Justin turned to me, frowning. I grimaced sheepishly. Iris, having finished cooing Wex into a calm state, glared up at Bobby. “Tópsú iccingpä nóen ymén atcén!” She jabbed a scolding finger at him.

“What the fuck was that!?” Bobby pointed down at her, a giant imitation of Iris’s stance at over six feet. “Is that kid speaking Japanese?”

I rolled my eyes. “I think I’ve watched enough raw anime to know if she’s speaking Japanese, and that’s not Japanese.” I frowned. “I don’t know what it is.”

“Where did she come from?” Justin asked, still frowning but his tone set in a light, curious inflection.

I sighed. “I found her wandering Central Park. She stole some food and the cops were chasing her.” I met Justin’s gaze. “She’s all alone, I couldn’t just leave her there.” Justin’s eyes softened.

“That’s just great,” Bobby growled. “So you couldn’t take her to an orphanage or something? I mean, how the heck are we supposed to take care of her? We don’t need yet another person living here.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be taking care of her.”

Bobby’s eyebrows rose. “You? How often have we heard you say you hated kids? And here you come home with a stray?” He chuckled. “What, did she follow you home?”

“Ésyen Ïén ídden,” Iris said, hands on her hips and staring Bobby down.

I growled back at him. “You tell him, Iris.”

“Iris?” Justin rounded the couch to take a better look at her. “Did you give her that name, or…”

“She told me her name was Iris. She seems to understand English somewhat, and can say a little I think, but she doesn’t seem to speak it.”

Iris turned around and faced me, a serious expression on her face. “Iën ícéló Lvéneth ëttérbë.” She made a face, scrunching up her nose again. “Ómmoncí eelsfä únnyfí nóen ymën ónguétä.” She stuck out her tongue and tapped it for emphasis.

“Whoa, that’s some seriously strange language there,” Bobby said, whistling. “So you think she’s Scandinavian or something? Kinda sounds Norwegian or something?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know,” Justin added. “She kind of has oriental features. Not exactly European-looking.”

Iris stared back at Justin, wide-eyed at first, then they narrowed. “Tïën'sen otnén olítëpé otén tarésë.” She harrumphed at him indignantly.

I couldn’t help but chuckle. “I don’t think she likes how you’re examining her.”

Iris nodded at me. “Xactlyeth.”

Justin straightened up stiffly, blinking down at Iris. “Oh, right. Sorry.” Iris nodded her acknowledgement of his apology.

“So yeah, this is Iris,” I introduced lamely, following Justin’s path around the couch and putting a hand on Iris’s shoulder. “Iris, I want you to meet Justin and Bobby.” I pointed to each boy in turn. Iris nodded to Justin but gritted her teeth and glared at Bobby.

Justin stuck a hand out. “Nice to meet you, Iris.” Iris took his hand graciously, totally at ease in meeting someone new. Like she’d done it so many times before. I half expected her to curtsey at him, though she did bob her head in a little bow. Justin chuckled. “Polite little thing, isn’t she?” Iris grinned at the compliment.

Bobby hesitantly stuck his own hand out, a little wary. “Yeah, sorry about that. Kinda got off on the wrong foot, there.”

Iris’s little chin protruded defiantly up at Bobby, her eyes narrowed. After giving him a brief stare down, Bobby glancing at me and Justin looking for help, Iris blew out a heavy breath and softened her features. She took his hand and shook it briefly. Justin burst out laughing.

“Not even Cora has put Bobby that much ill at ease!” He held his sides as the laughing grew silent. “Nice job!” He gave a thumbs up at Iris and she grinned back at him.

Bobby glared at Justin. “Oh ha ha.”

Iris looked down at her dress, shaking it a bit, then turned to me. “Ién hïnctó Ien eednú áen áthbí.”

I glanced down at her. “I’ve no idea what you just said.” In looking at her outfit and straggly hair, a bit poofy and tangled, I could see that though she wasn’t particularly dirty, she could do with a bit of cleaning up. “Maybe you should take a bath.”

Iris raised an eyebrow at me and huffed indignantly, as if I’d said something stupid. “What?” Instead of answering, she put her hand in mine and indicated by pointing that I should lead on.

Justin shrugged at me. “I guess she wants to take a bath?”

Bobby frowned. “Does she even understand English with that baby babble of hers?”

Iris responded to him in her language, a bit affronted from the sound of it. “She seems to.” Wex leapt out of Iris’s arms and waited by her side for us to go. “I’ll…be right back,” I said to the guys.

I lead her down the hall to the bathroom. Iris let go of my hand and gazed curiously around the room. She wasn’t tall enough to reach the sink, I noticed. Perhaps I’d need to get a little stool for her. She pushed back the shower curtain, a beige curtain with a transparent lining covered in goldfish. The girls had chosen the lining and somehow their vote had outnumbered us guys. I never minded. The goldfish were cute. Not that I ever let on that I enjoyed something cute like goldfish.

Or Iris. I had to admit the kid was cute. Precocious, but cute. As she stared intently at the shower curtain, I could see Iris, too, appreciated the goldfish as a smile formed on her face.
“All right,” I started, hoping she’d understand what I was about to say. Iris turned her attention to me, still holding on to the curtain, Wex playfully batting at the closest goldfish picture as if he thought it was real. “The heat isn’t working, so we have to heat up water in the microwave.”

Hmm, I wonder if she understood what a microwave was. Did it translate well into her language? Briefly, I wondered if she’d ever even seen a microwave. I’d seen her glance at the TV and computer with interested fascination and had the thought that wherever she came from, or however she’d been raised they did not have such conveniences. I found it a bit hard to believe, but the possibility would not erase itself from my mind.

“Wait here while I heat up some water. It might take a little while to get enough water heated.” With the gas stove not working, either, it was harder than ever to get food cooked, not to mention having water for cleaning ourselves. We had a few smaller containers set aside for heating water. Put on in the microwave then when it was done, put in the next and take the first to the tub and begin filling it. Then repeat the process. It took some time to get it filled, and inevitably the water would start to cool in the meantime, but as long as the water wasn’t frigid, we were able to take a quick bath. It brought to mind what life was like in times before indoor plumbing and heated water. Except for the microwave part, of course.

I turned to leave the room when I felt something tug on my shirt. Iris peered up at me from under her long lashes, holding tight to the back of my shirt. “Hey, it’s okay,” I said patting her head, “I’ll be right back.”

Iris made a small growling whine in her throat and ducked away from my hand. Still tugging my shirt, she pulled me towards the tub. “Wait a minute, I told you there’s no hot water. I’ll be right back.”

Ignoring me, she let go and began fiddling with the knobs for the tub. “Hey! Didn’t you hear me?” I reached out and grabbed the knobs turning them off. There went my theory that she understood English. Obviously what I’d said hadn’t gotten through to her.

Iris glared something fierce at me, her lower lip sticking out and breathing so hard through her nose I practically expected smoke to start curling up out of her nostrils. Shoving a warning finger into my face, she growled, “Ién nówca hátwa Íen'men óíngdí.” So startled by her anger, I froze as she turned back on the water. I could almost feel the room growing colder by the moment as the frigid water filled the tub.

Once the tub had filled to a good depth for a bath, Iris shut off the water and stuck a finger in it. “See,” I said, finally finding myself able to speak. “Cold. You can’t bathe in that.”

Iris swiveled her eyes briefly over to glance at me, then went back to gazing down into the water. Slowly she started moving her finger in a circle, tiny rippled floating away from the center. Under her breath I hear her start to chant something. It was low and musical, a bit repetitious, and from what I could tell not in the same language as her normal speech. Without words to even ask what she was doing, I could only watch as she traced a rippling circle through the water, chanting, growing progressively more intense as she spoke. At last she spoke a final two words, leaning in to dip her whole hand into the tub.

I felt something stir around us, like a breeze or static. The air seemed to be charged with something. Not just the air, though. I could feel it deep in my chest, my whole being seemed to vibrate, almost like I’d downed a whole six pack of energy drinks. My brain sizzled and every nerve moved with such alertness, every fiber very awake and aware. Whatever it was, it touched something in me in a powerful way and I almost thought I knew it. Something in my soul recognized it and sang from its touch.

Then it was gone. I almost slumped, the energy gone. Holy shit, what the hell was that?! I felt so strange. I looked to Iris, to see if she had felt the same thing and she gazed up at me with a bright and cheerful grin. Still dazed and drained from whatever I’d felt, I didn’t even flinch when Iris took my hand and placed it in the tub.

The water was warm.

Forgotten Castles - Chapter 13

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 16:52:01 GMT

Of course I've still been writing this, though I've been neglecting to post up my chapters. I'm determined to finish, damn it! I'm only kind of unofficially doing the NaNoFiMo - National Novel Finishing Month. Especially as there is no way to keep count of words on the forum site and it's kind of unoffical to begin with. It at least give me some motivation to keep writing.

That, and Malinda keeps threatening to kidnap Effie and take hostage pictures. Although last time, she threatened just to take her feet. As her feet magnet onto her, at least their easy to come off, but still, she needs those for standing! My poor Effie.

(In other, related BJD news, my littlefee order is in! I finished paying for it and hopefully by Friday my Liam will be here! Maybe Malinda can do Liam's face-up before the meet on Saturday? Hint, hint. - not that she reads this to get the hint...)

So anyway, the story is coming along, I'm starting to identify the scenes that need to be played out, the climax of the story, the conflicts that need to occur and I'm getting that much closer to finishing the first draft - just in time for doing some editing! Yay! Oh a writer's job is never done...

Oh, and I changed how Iris's Elven is written, it looks more elven, though it's kind of a cheater Elven. Ultimately, I expect to put translations of her speach at the end of my novel, but as the Elven currently stands, what I've used is a Pig Elven language, kind of like Pig Latin. And if you know anything about Pig Latin, you can probably look at the Pig Elven and figure out what she's actually saying. No idea if how I've done it is the final way of having her use Elven, but for right now it works for me.

I directed us toward the nearest subway station. Iris next to me began fiddling with her sandwich. It had been cut into two triangles. Iris removed the one triangle and inspected its insides. First she dabbed a finger at the mayonnaise hesitantly. Now covered in mayonnaise, she stuck the finger in her mouth, an inquisitive expression pinching her mouth. After sucking the condiment, she shrugged her tiny shoulders, eyebrows lifted in acceptance.

Next she pulled at the meat. It tore a little as she wiggled it out from between the tomato and lettuce. Sticking the edge of what was left of the sandwich in her mouth, she set about tearing the meat into little pieces, her fingers all gooey from the mayonnaise. I thanked my lucky stars the kid had quick holding on to me to do this.

“What are you doing?” I asked, glancing sideways down at her.

She pointed to the cat. “Iën'men eedingfë Wex,” she said around the wedge of sandwich, making her speech that much more unintelligible.

I just nodded like I understood. “Uh huh.”

One by one, she tossed the tiny pieces of meat down to the cat. Wex caught each pieces as it fell, chewing it quickly before Iris tossed the next piece. In between each toss, she would take another bite of the now meatless sandwich. She ate deftly, chewing slow and methodically, never once leaving her mouth opened or dropping a crumb like so many other little children.

As a matter of fact, she held herself well, poised, without slouching. Her head held high, shoulders down, and rolled her feet from heal to toe. She didn’t bounce much, her eyes didn’t wander all over the place, and amazingly kept up with my pace, though I slowed down so as to not overtax her short little legs.

Her eye slid up to find me watching her. “Orfen óuyën?” She held out the second half of the sandwich to me. Still bewildered by her, I took the sandwich, thinking how I hadn’t had lunch yet anyway. With her hands now free, she removed the apple from on of her coat pockets and took a small baby bite.

I examined my sandwich briefly before taking a bite. Turkey. Not my favorite, but I’d live. One of those lunch meat turkey slices sandwiches, too. Not exactly high quality. Food is food, though.

We reached the entrance to the subway and I went to put a hand on Iris’s shoulder to lead her in, only to discover she wasn’t next to me anymore. I turned around, feeling a flitter of panic, and saw her standing still a few feet behind me.

“Hey, you okay? Come on, I don’t want to lose you.” I held out my hand to her.

Iris pointed at the entrance. “Tién méllssë unnyfë nien hereto.”

I looked behind me, trying to see what she pointed at. “There’s nothing to be afraid of in there. It’s safe.” Mostly, I thought. “Trust me.” I smiled encouragingly and held a hand out to her again.

Whether it had been my words or tone or smile, she much have decided to trust me and walked forward to take my hand. She said something down at Wex and the cat’s tail bristled as it stalked along side us, turning its head this way and that as if on sentry.

When we reached the toll booth, I checked the area quickly then leapt over the turnstile, soaring feet first like a gymnast over those vault things. I turned back to Iris who looked up at me wide-eyed. “You next.” I reached out and lifted her from under her arms and over to my side. Gently, I glided her back onto her feet. Wex joined us after glancing curiously up at the turnstile as he trotted underneath it.

Picking Iris up was like picking up slightly heavy air. She weighed practically nothing. The kid was going to start getting a complex from how hard I kept staring at her.

I, too, had always been an unhealthy light weight, according to normal standards. Of course, I wasn’t normal. That didn’t stop doctors from poking and prodding and trying to get me to eat more. Nothing they did helped or determined what was wrong with me. I was just naturally, or unnaturally as the case may be, light.

Taking her hand again, we headed off toward the stairs down to the N line subway. Iris craned her head up and around, staring at everything as we went passed – the people, the ceiling, the tiles, even the graffiti on the walls. I hoped she didn’t know what some of them said, none of them had anything positive to say and all had liberal use of swear words and genitals.

We reached the platform, Iris curling into my legs and nearly causing me to trip as more people crowed the area and jumping every time she heard the distant thunder of a train. With it being rush hour on a work day, everyone wanted to use the subways to get home quicker and consequentially the platform quickly became packed with other passengers. I looked down at the little girl as she clutched onto my leg in a vice grip. If I wasn’t careful, the poor kid was going to get trampled. Sighing, I reached down and picked her up. Iris buried her head in my neck, obviously grateful, but my cheeks warmed and I glanced around to see if anyone noticed the display.

“Hátwú bóutäth Wex?” she asked a moment later, lifting her head from my shoulder and pointing down to the cat.

I recognized the name Wex and saw her meaning, though I didn’t understand the words. The poor cat was having a heck of a time trying to stay out from under any one else’s feet. “Maybe you should carry Wex,” I said to her, hoping I was right about her understanding English. “Can you carry Wex?”

She nodded and leaned down at an angle to see the cat. “Puén, Wex! Ómécï!”

With that command, the cat leapt up, latching his little claws into my jean legs. “Ack! What the heck! Not like that!” Still trying to climb me, I quickly shifted the girl onto one arm and reached out to grab the cat by the scruff, pulling him off like tightly looped Velcro. I handed him over to Iris and shifted her weight back onto both arms. She took the cat gratefully, hugging him to her and murmuring quietly while the cat purred in contentment.

Ungrateful cat. Didn’t even thank me.

I shook my head. Like I expected a thank you from a cat? I must not be thinking straight.

Minutes passed and I heard the tell tale sign of an incoming train. Iris’s eyes widen sharply and she stared, clutching Wex tighter. A moment later, the train arrived, whizzing passed us as it slowed, kicking up a strong current before it did. It brought with it the smell of gas and rotting garbage, and whatever else lurked in the recesses of train tunnels. Despite all the time I explored the city, I never once felt the need to delve into the subway tunnels.

When I looked back at Iris, I had to suppress a grin. The astonishment she exhibited upon seeing the train was akin to watching a kid on Christmas morning. Her eyes weren’t afraid, just awed. Like she’d never seen anything like it. It made me almost laugh, being able to bring her some place she’d never been before.

Though it made me wonder how she lived in the city and never once been to the subway before. I frowned again, contemplating the girl more.

The doors of the cars swished open and the waves of people surged forward, pushing against a similar wave exiting the cars. I pushed along with everyone else and made it to one of the metal hand bars, a quick glance at the crowd of people eliminating immediately the possibility of seats. Knowing it would be difficult to hold onto the bar and hold Iris, I gently put her down.

“Hold onto the bar, okay?” I grabbed the bar as the doors slid closed, and taking hold of Iris’s shoulder so I wouldn’t lose her.

Iris nodded and took the bar in her tiny hands. She barely had taken it when the train shot off on its run. Iris let out a squeak of surprise and her grip on the bar slacked, sending her tumbling to the floor and knocking into several business men’s legs. Wex remained tucked securely in her arms.

Guilt and panic rose up as I lost hold of her. “Whoa, are you okay?” I planted my feet firmly to the floor and reached out to help Iris up, apologizing to the gentlemen behind her. This time I placed her in front of me, closer to the bar so if she fell again, she’d fall against me. I could have kicked myself for not thinking of it sooner. Of course if she’d never been on a subway before she was going to fall. Already I was sucking at taking care of the kid. I don’t know what made me think I could help her.

Iris looked up at me, a little shaken but still awed. “Fast,” she said in a hushed tone.

I chuckled weakly. “Yeah, fast.” The tension in my chest alleviated as I realized she hadn’t been hurt, just stunned. I’d watch her better from now on.

When we finally reached our destination, after a hectic train transfer amid the bustle of peek rush hour, I lead Iris back up to the streets. Wex jumped out of her arms and walked next to us now that the crowd had thinned. What a sight we must have looked like! Two kids being followed by a gangly not-quite-cat-not-quite-kitten, with the girl chattering to the cat a mile a minute in her strange, lyrical language as if the cat understood everything she said. Of course it certainly seemed to and Iris commented on everything she saw, pointing to buildings and people and cars and lights. At least that’s what I assumed she was doing.

At the corner of our street, I checked both ways before crossing then ran across the street, Iris in tow, racing against the red stop light before a car came zooming across. Iris kept pace easily enough. The apartment building came into view. My stomach twisted slightly upon seeing it, realizing once again that an explanation would be in order. I doubted I’d be lucky enough to find the place empty – not with how many roommates I had – and wouldn’t get more time to come up with a story for little Iris before I could get her settled.

My mind flashed with several different explanations as to why she had to stay. I’d tell the truth – to a point. None of my roommates would be so unfeeling as to not understand why I wanted to help the kid. It would be why I needed to bring her here that would baffle them. There was no way I could explain to them my suspicions about her. Though it was never talked about openly, my roommates knew about certain aspects of my “condition”, especially Justin as I’d known him the longest. Still, I never felt they really believed me. Not really. No one ever did, until there came a point when belief was the only thing that made sense of the strange truth in front of their eyes. Only after time passed did anyone finally believe.

I couldn’t tell them about Iris. I wasn’t even sure about her myself. Better to let them see her as just a normal girl. A normal girl who needed my help specifically out of all of New York. Yeah, right, like they’d ever buy that.

I sighed as we climbed the stoop to the front door of my building. Iris looked up at me, a little frown curling her lips down. Her eyebrows scrunched up and her eyes stared into mine. “Reáen óúyën lláen ightré?” she asked with concern.

I shook my head and put on a smile for her. “Don’t worry, everything will be fine. You’ll like my roommates. They’re nice.”

Her concerned eyebrow scrunch didn’t go away, but she followed me into the building. Mrs. Mendelson’s cats were out and about as usual. One hissed angrily at Wex, swiping a paw at him. He sprang back in surprise. “Whoa! Careful there,” I warned both Iris and the cat, planting a foot between the two. I’d never seen any of her cats get so angry before. Then again, I’d never seen a stray cat introduced into the group before, either.

Iris murmured something down at Wex and the cat let out a yowl that sounded almost like speech. My eyebrows rose nearly into my hair. Was he talking to them? After yowling a bit, doing whatever cat body language – possibly giving off some cat odor I was unaware of; you know, cat stuff – the other cats backed off, sitting themselves down for a cleaning and allowing Wex and Iris and I to continue by unmolested.

While gawking at Wex, I noticed a satisfied smirk on Iris’s face. She smiled down at Wex and said something to him that sounded like a pleased “job well done” thank you. The relationship between Iris and her cat continued to astound me.

Expecting the kid to poop out half way up the long flights of stairs, seeing as how our apartment was situated at the top floor, Iris surprised me by climbing each flight without a single protest or heaved sigh of stress. I had thought about the possibility of needing to carry her up at least some of the flights, if not all. More than surprising me, it pleased me. In all honesty, I respected her for it. This wasn’t some bratty little kid. This was a good, smart kid. If those cute baby blues hadn’t turned me to mush earlier, this would have more than solidified my liking of the kid.

Huh. Me, Konnel Mythalene, liking kids? Who’d have guessed? Weird.

As I stood outside our apartment door, I took a deep breath and blew it out. The time had come.

Forgotten Castles Review

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 22:31:06 GMT

So last Thursday was our writer's group meeting here in town. Every second and fourth Thursdays in every month we gather at the town library and exchange writings to help us all improve as writers. I don't always submit something, as until last month I hadn't really been writing much. I try to be constructive for whoever has written something, though. We have some entertaining stories running through our group, even if under ordinary circumstances I wouldn't have picked up their books in a store I have been enjoying them.

For this last meeting (the only meeting of the month because of the holiday), I figured I'd submit my first chapter of my novel that I'd been working on. Most of the writers in the group are older and more experienced than me - one has already published a book! - and hearing what they had to say would only be helpful for me. Taking into consideration that they are not technically my target audience - none of them are the urban fantasy type (although one writes Sci Fi), they had some really great comments to make!

Several things they mentioned were typos and the like, things easily fixed in editing. I've already taken care of those issues in my completed manuscript. Another had to do with tense issues. I'm quite aware that I have some issues with verb tense in my stories. I'm working on fixing that and when I write I am very aware of verbs when I type them. I don't always catch everything, however. The one specific they made mention of was how in the beginning of my first chapter I'm writing in a kind of narrative, present form, and then I switch to the past tense for describing the events that are actually happening in the story. I'm not entirely sure how to resolve this problem.

Some of the good things that were said. The Sci Fi guy I think was the only one who kind of understood what my character was: The elf is very cynical and angry...you get that across very well. Very humorous narration...could be listening to a stand-up routine. Most stand up routines come from a bitter, angry childhood." I kind of thought that was interesting.

"A haunting story which still leaves many questions unanswered, but goes a long way in giving the character's background while developing an empathy despite, and because of, his sardonic traits. The anti-aging trait, however, is mystifying, and the reader wishes to have this point explained, and soon." Hmm, not sure how to deal with this last bit, as the point of the story is his discovery of who he is. It takes him a little while to get there. Hints are made throughout the story. I believe others on several occasions have called him a "myth", an "elf", a "demon", a "spawn of Satan", and "Peter Pan". (Also Robin Hood, but I don't think that helps describe what he is.) The clues are in the story, even if the actual reveal isn't for a while. I don't know if that would be considered good enough, though. I do appreciate the fact that he's gotten my character right on the ball there in the beginning.

"Your prose is clear and I managed to follow it with ease. There were very few typos or spelling gaffes as near as I can tell. You convey suspense with a certain degree of skill. You have set up a fantastic situation within the middle of the workaday world and it doesn't feel awkward. Your main character is gifted (or cursed) in an unusual way and it will be interesting to see how she" Yes, he thought my main character was a she - perhaps I need more qualifyers for him? "handles this and the obsticles that come her way. Your main character is sketched out fairly well. We sense her lonliness and bitterness at being born different than everyone else. We'll have to see more of her to determine whether she is truly well-drawn, though." All in all, not bad. I'm glad to know the premise doesn't feel awkward. A lot of what I've been trying to get out has gotten through, so that's good.

"Use of language is good, seems to have been written from an intimate perspective. This person - the narrator - has some challenges and they seem to be rather introspective at dealing with them. The language seems to come from the heart and can be felt that way." Awesome! Just what I was trying to get across! I do worry, sometimes, that my future chapters don't read the same way at my first. I felt really connected with Konnel when I wrote the first chapter and it come really easily. Maybe because it came from the heart. I'm a little worried about disappointing in subsequent chapters.

So the bad. As I said, most of the bad stuff was a little about typos and tense issues Only two of the four (it was a really small meeting last Thursday) wrote anything besides that and have really given me something to think about in terms of my story.

"I wonder if the opening narration was really necessary. Did you really need your main character to give us her back story with such exposition? Wouldn't it have been better to just start in the middle of the action (like at the bottom of page 2, for instance)?" Page two was right around the area where I started to explain what Konnel was actually doing. "Also, sometimes you go overboard on the narration. How about letting up on the sarcasm and caustic rejoinders a bit?" Hmm, I suppose I could see his point. I can occasionally have the dendency to overdo things a bit. Good to know. I get very into things, and besides, it's better to have too much and weed back than to not have enough and scramble to put stuff in. At least I have a framework to work off of. I'll have to see what I can do.

"There is no dialogue. Perhaps we could see a brief conversation with Sister Josephine, instead of just hearing about what she'd said? That would allow character development for both; at this point both are basically single-dimentioned." Interesting, as others had said Konnel was well rounded. I suppose I could write a bit of dialogue as a flashback in the scene. She can't actually be there, though. "It's difficult to tell where this story is going, at least from chapter 1. Is this a retelling - maybe even a reversal - of The Picture of Dorian Gray? (Or maybe "The Pirates of Penzance"...)" He commented about "Pirates" because of Konnel's birth date being of some kind of importance, like Fredrick's February 29th birthday. Always coming, never reached. Though I'm amused he thinks me literary enough in my writing to try and do a retelling of Dorian Gray! "There are very few clues in this chapter to suggest the story, other than the woes of a person who appears to use a calender that is different from the ones the rest of us use. Science Fiction, perhaps?" Prime example of not my audience. Urban Fantasy. And the story is about his search for who he is and his redemption from a fallen path. I suppose I could do more to foreshadow that, though I thought I did with the introduction of the cross at the end of the chapter. Perhaps I took too long to get there? "Suggestion: Don't put a cliche in the opening paragraph. The first few lines of any written work are the most critical, and using a trite phrase at that point can poison the entire work." He makes a good point, and it's possible I may not want to keep the beginning of the chapter. But it got me started with the writing, it served its purpose. Although I thought the opening line was funny because it was trite. Like, omg, I can't believe she said that. Something like that. Ah, whatever.

I truly appreciated the advice and comments my groupmates sent me, and I'll be keeping them in mind for the future. I may have to reread my second chapter more fully before I send it out to the group, just to make sure some of the issues mentioned here aren't repeated in the next chapter. I kinda wish the one member had been there this week. I really respect his opinions on everyone else's works, and he has such an engaging novel about spies and stuff that I would have loved to have heard what he thought about my story. Maybe, since his non participation had been last minute, he wrote something to hand to me next time? That'd be cool.

I'm still kinda syked about having others comment on my work, that I'm almost considering offering up my novel for other Nanoers to critique. There are forums set up for novel swapping right now and it might be kind of fun to do. Read someone else's, having them read mine (I'm still trying to read Hakari-chan's - gomen, gomen!). Well, we'll see.

WoW Sucks

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 01:08:13 GMT

Tuesday (or was it Wednesday?), well, whatever day last week, a new patch came out for World of Warcraft. As soon as it finished downloading, I was no longer able to press play on my WoW launcher to get into the game.

WTF?

I kinda let it go for days, too pissed and into my writing in any case to care enough to try to fix it. Really, Blizzard should be fixing the problem themselves, as I was far from the only person to experience this problem. So today, a cold, wet dreary day, seemed like the perfect day to tinker with my computer, using some of the methods floating around the WoW forums.

It didn't work, on either my laptop or the computer we got from my grandmother. (She recently got herself a better computer and we inherited this one - not a bad computer, but majorly sucks on the RAM department; 256MB!) So in a last ditch effort, I decided to uninstall then reinstall the game.

This is after hours of trying other things. I copied the newest patches so I wouldn't have to redownload them and set my computer up to reinstall the game.

Meanwhile, bored out of my mind and tired as hell, I thought I'd check up the WoW forums to see what other ideas people had if this one failed me. On one thread, consisting of 70 pages and over 1300 posts, I came across people saying that a new version of C++ needed to be installed. I'd seen something like this the other day - making sure some .NET Framework update was installed? - but something went wrong with the download and it stopped. So I thought this might be the same thing. But I thought maybe it'd work on this computer. I hadn't tried, so I'd see what happened.

I went to the link. It looked the same as the one I tried days before (but I think all the programs from the Microsoft site look this way). I started the download then went to check on my laptop downstairs to see how the reinstallation was going. 11%. Bleh. It was going to take forever. Came back upstairs, and the download screen was gone. *scratch head* Sooo...did it finish? Unsure, but hopeful, I clicked on the WoW launcher, then pressed 'Play'.

My cursor had an hourglass next to it. Oooo, that's a good sign. A new window came up. Oooo, that's different! I refused to cheer until I saw my character list, however. I signed in, did the agreement stuff and selected Mannaroth as my server.

There was Juri, my gnome mage, sitting in Elwyn Forest at the Goldshire Inn. I cheered and entered the game. Woot! There she was! Everything was as it should be! And it took so much less effort than all the crap I'd been doing all afternoon. Noticing I had mail, I tried to move towards the entrance to the mailbox.

Tried, I said, as moving Juri was like trying to move a mountain. At 256MB, my game had slowed to the crawl of having 500,000 other players on my server in that inn room at the same time. I was going no where fast. Although I managed to get to the mailbox and pick up my mail, I knew that playing through a quest - or heaven forbid, a dungeon! - was going to get me killed if anywhere near my level. And possibly getting my teammates killed.

Now if only I had tried this method on my laptop before I decided to uninstall and reinstall the game. *pout* Last I checked, the reinstallation was at 74%, after over two hours of the process. I haven't been able to check to see if the method used to get this hunk of junk up and running with the game works with my laptop or not. I'm praying it does, and soon, as I really want to play Blackrock Spire tonight and get my worg pup. *sigh*

Let me just say - Blizzard, you guys suck. Don't go sending out patches that piss so many users off like that. Fix your issues and don't make us do it. It's what we pay $15 a month for. We're just players, not technicians.

Cross your fingers that WoW will be up for me before I have to go to bed.

Christmas Banter

Sat, 12 Dec 2009 01:00:53 GMT

I am so exhausted. In the last few days, I've decorated all four of the little trees, wrapped my friend's presents for tonight's present exchange, and wrapped a few smaller boxes for the kids - some of them as decorations, some actually having little presents in them (most of them for Effie - I'd say she's spoiled, but she doesn't act like it).

Then today I set up a little group shoot with all my kids infront of the set up. Oh man, that took forever! First I had to put the backdrop up. It kept leaning forward or backward. Took forever for it to stay. Then I had to situate the kids, put some more material on the floor and over the bench. (Sadly several of my big kids have a near impossible chance of standing. Bobobie bodies are horribly strung.) Then, to top it off, they didn't exactly fit neatly in front of the backdrop. In order not to cut anyone out, it meant that I had to see some of the very messy room (cluttered). So more sheets had to go up to cover the boxes and American girl dolls and keyboard and tv. Bleh.

Everything came out looking pretty good, though. I even managed to come up with two bright lights to help light the scene (my family room is the worst place in the house to get clear pictures, but the only place in the house that I can set up backdrops - oh the conundrum!) I tried to see about doing some after shoot fixing up of the issues by using the Gimp program. I'm too broke/too cheap to buy photoshop and something tells me that the tutorials on DoA won't be much help with Gimp. I have no idea how to use this program. I've figured out how to lighten and darken the image, played around with some effects - kind of fun - but no idea how to get those impressive images you see all the time running around DoA. I'd hoped to be able to lift the foreground from the picture and replace the background (where you can see wires and what not) with a black background or maybe something more festive, but there's no easy "replace background" button or something. I'm flying blind! So in the end, I cropped the picture as best I could and just adjusted the lighting. Maybe I'll try reading the user manual from top to bottom in hopes that I can get any useful information from it. Maybe someone on DoA uses it and can help me work out what I'm trying to get done.

So now, with the girls on their way, I've got a horrible decision to make: Leave the kids where they are and freak out the girls (inevitably moving them bacause at least one of them is going to be looking at Malinda - freaks her out), or just move them as quickly as I can before they get here. Blah. Took forever to get them down, too.

Sooo tired.

......Ok, up they go. Hopefully more Christmas pictures will be done this week. Little group stuff. I'm done with the massive amounts of doll resin. Not fun lugging around 29 dolls throughout the house.

Baby Dragons!

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 19:44:47 GMT

Oh my goodness! My dragon eggs have hatched! I've got the cutest little dragon babies!
They are so friggin cute! I especially love my pink baby. Now I have to hope that they can grow up within the next seven days. Click on my babies to help them grow! At least I won't have to worry about them dying once they've matured into adults. I was so worried that I'd end up killing them. Some how they've gained a butt load of views within the last day. I guess putting them on that one forum and asking for help really did them good! I don't know if I'll keep getting more of these things, I hate the idea of killing them, but every once in a while I might pick up a new egg if it looks strange and different. I like the weird-looking eggs. I want one of the eggs floating on a cloud.

Now I need to name them! Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated as I want to make sure they have the perfect names. I also want to make sure their name is appropriate to their sex. I think I heard that pink ones are always girls, so that should make life easier. I'll have to check out their genders. ...Hmm, they don't seem to have genders yet. Ah well. In any case, yay for baby dragons!

Christmas Tree Fun!

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 21:12:03 GMT

Even though it's ended up being more trouble than I've been expecting, I've finally got all my little trees up and lit for Christmas! Yeah, I know I'm a bit crazy, but I have four Christmas trees sitting on the coffee table downstairs in our family room. I have a four foot tall tree from when I lived at the appartment with Alissa two years ago. I couldn't not have a tree. Then last year, I went searching everywhere for more doll apropriately sized trees. I found, after the end of the season no less, a three footer and a two footer. The three foot tree is decent for the SDs and taller. The two foot is good for the minis. Then in January, I got a bunch of decorations, plus a one foot tall tree, from Jackie_NJ. This is good for most of my tinies.

My four foot tree came with lights already strung. My two foot tree was a kit, coming with lights, decorations and tinsel garland. The poor three and one foot trees had no lights. So I checked out Michaels. They had a little battery operated 10 light strand. This is perfect for my little one foot tree! They had nothing for my three foot tree, however. This depressed me, as now all my trees needed to be lit, if three of them were.

I'm sure you're seeing my crazy emerging.

After finding nothing in Walmart, Walgreens, Party City and Sears Essentials, I began to feel like giving up. Either that, or give in and deal with 50 lights and 12.5 feet. That seemed a bit exessive.

Malinda then found small strands of lights at CVS! 20 lights! Granted, I had to get two of them to fit (okay, so maybe that 50 light strand wasn't so long a thing after all...), but now all my trees are lit! All I have to do is decorate them now with the plethora of tiny ornaments I've picked up over the last two years. The trees even have little tree skirts! I had to make one for the one footer, as it was so small, but the point is, it has one. I even found a little battery operated train to go around it!

Once everything is decorated, I plan to go crazy taking pictures of it with the kids. I'll probably post them when I'm done. Then you can witness first hand my craziness.

I love Christmas. *dances off*

Randomness

Fri, 04 Dec 2009 20:49:48 GMT

So trying to find new stuff to do in the wake of Nano. I've been looking through the sewing forum section of DoA, checking out all the tutorials for outfits to make for the kids. I've been trying my hand at the sock hoodies, though with the current pair of socks I'm using, it's actually going to be a long sweater jacket for Effie, my Lft Ante. And since it's stretchy, I've made the arms long enough to be decent for a shorter sweater for my minifees. I love versitility.

I found this cute little site with these baby dragon hatchlings that you can adopt. So far I have this little egg. Still trying to figure out how to work it so the little guy can get hatched. Unfortunately I'd have to completely rework my signature on DoA to add him, as I have a lot of dollies there, taking up most of my 400 character count. Not sure if there's a better way to up load him. I'm hoping he won't die! He needs views or something to be able to hatch - apparently that's what he eats. Let's see how long it takes me to kill the poor thing. (I am so bad at keeping these kinds of things alive. *guilty*)

Besides that, I've been checking out "I Wrote a Novel, Now What?" on the NaNo site. They have a list on the bottom of the page talking about other NaNo-like events that happen throughout the year, though only Script Frenzy is actually associated with NaNo. The month of December has NaNoFiMo - National Novel Finishing Month. For those of us - and let's see a show of hands, 'cause I know it's most of you - who have not finished our novel in NaNoWriMo, this month gives us the challenge of actually finishing the novel with writing at least another 30k words. If figured it was worth a try, to see if, during the crazy Yule Tide season, I can actually get anything done.

'Cause then in March is NaNoEdMo - National Novel Editing Month. Hopefully by then, I'll at least be fully done, beginning to end, with my first draft. I can take the month to at least start my editing.

I need to finish the complete book and have it somewhat decent as a manuscript before July 1, 2010. For that is the dead line to be able to use my special winner promo code and get a free paperback published copy of my book! I'm sure that even by then it won't be in any form I'd wishe to actually send to a publisher to get published for real, but a copy of my book! How cool is that!

In other BJD news, I am now the proud owner of a Iplehouse Luna Trainer human head!!! I absolutely fell in love with this girl like a week and a half ago when Malinda found out about it. Of course the ordering period for it had been over for a little bit already, but she doggedly pursued her dream of owning a kitty girl and put up a WTB for the Luna Trainer. On Wednesday, her girl came in and she is gorgeous! Sexy cat girl. However, to my luck, she had no interest in the human head, so I got to buy her! Or rather, now Malinda owes me less money from previous orders. *dances* She's gonna be my Tantenari, my Kalashtar psionic monk. I'll need to find her a body eventually. I wonder if the Bobobie/Resin Soul girl body in gray would look okay with her. Maybe when I get the Lady Sayuki gray body in for my Bygg head I can compare the resin matches.

Yes, I have officially ordered a body for my Bygg head that is part of my Christmas/Birthday present from Malinda. Of course, the little unicorns won't be getting here for a while, they haven't been paid off yet, so I probably won't see them until March or so. It'll just be a late Christmas/Birthday. No biggie.

And I might be getting an interview for a job soon! *dances* If I can just get back to being employed, I can feel less guilty about buying doll bits. Then some of my floating heads can have bodies again!

Speaking about bits, if you are old enough for adult material and don't find pervy things disgusting, take a look at this: http://www.buffdolls.net/. Look under "Optional Parts". When I saw this, I nearly snorted myself to death. If you don't like what you see, don't say I didn't warn you.

Forgotten Castles - Chapter 12

Sun, 29 Nov 2009 07:21:22 GMT

Yay! I finally got to Iris! I still might be missing sections that should be written before this section, but eh. I can write them in later.

Thanksgiving day was obviously a bust in terms of writing. I never really expected to get anything done. But I've been keeping it up the last two days and managed to finish yet another chapter plus a little bit. Here's that next chapter, the introduction to Iris.

A frigid wind whipped through the trees, buffeting against my body with force enough to push me back from the wall a few inches. Tears came to my eyes as the tiny ice particles on the wind stabbed into my face. Crap, was it going to snow again? I could almost smell it in the crispness of the air. The temperature and the slight overcast to the sky gave the day the perfect conditions for another blizzard.

After the blizzard the other week, dropping I don’t know how many feet of snow onto the ground, I wasn’t overly keen about another. The blizzard, a mixture of heavy snow and hail, had knocked out the power in our apartment, along with the heat. The gas heater had been iffy all month long, fizzing in and out the first few weeks of January, but the storm finally blew it out completely. Although the power returned, the heat had yet to be fixed. We’d actually bought those tiny electric heaters in an effort to keep us from freezing to death over night.

Not surprisingly, our building was not alone in the city for losing its heat. Reports abounded from many of the older, worn-down neighborhoods, of residents freezing to death, or near freezing. One elderly man in Harlem froze after falling asleep watching TV in his frigid apartment.

It almost felt warmer outside, with the faint rays of the sun making its feeble attempts to penetrate the haze. Well, except when the wind blew. The chill factor took away about fifteen degrees from the actual temperature. God, I hated it when it got this cold. I more enjoyed spring and autumn; cool, but not so frosty you couldn’t feel your extremities.

I had to admit though, as I looked out across Turtle Pond from the castle tower, that the white, pristine snow that covered the park looked pretty. A little blinding at times, but it had this peaceful, calming effect, hushing the world into awed silence. Icy trees glittered like crystals in the weak sunlight. A forest of jewels.

A car blared its horn, the noise echoing throughout the nearby streets, breaking the silence. The breeze hit me again, as if angry over the disruption from the tranquility, attempting to smooth over the interruption. Teeth chattering under a heavy woolen scarf, I thought it best if I made my way back down the tower stairs. The wind was stronger up here.

Only a few brave souls climbed their way up the tower stairs during winter. Most realize their mistake quick enough. I was one of the ones stupid enough to do it. I liked the view. Sometimes, I could ignore the towering buildings and forget where I was, believing I stood on the turrets of a real castle. Idle fantasies.

It had been the first decent day in quite some time, what with all the snow. The crew battle had to be canceled and postponed for a later date, as the blizzard ripped through the northeast on the day the battle was to commence. It felt really good to get out of the apartment for a while. I needed to escape. If I had to stare at those same walls and deal with my roommates a moment longer I would have gone insane. Plus, Jenny was working today, so I didn’t even have her to help take the edge off of the cabin fever setting in. Cold as it was, I liked traveling around the city, wandering from place to place.

For some reason, it always ends up here. At Belvedere Castle. It’s like I’m a glutton for punishment. Really, I don’t know what I’m looking for anymore, but it’s the best place I go to for escape. It’s a good place to reflect and think.

Not that I was thinking much of anything in particular today. Mostly the absence of thought. It cleared my head, though that might have been the mind-numbing winter wind. Hard to think when below zero temperatures froze all the brain synapses. I imagined icicles forming at the edges. Yup, brain ice meant it was time to go home.

The sun suddenly poked its head out of the clouds, stabbing a ray of light into my unaccustomed eyes as I exited the castle back onto the platform. I shielded my eyes with my hand, a little ticked off I’d forgotten my sunglasses. Hadn’t expected to need them.

As my eyes adjusted to the sudden blinding light, I thought I saw a strange black figure out of the corner of my eye. Something in my memory began clicking and, curious, I turned my head toward the figure. A heavily bundled up figure in black was making its descent down the stairs back onto the park pathway. That in itself wouldn’t have been strange – everyone was dressed in bulky layers. What struck me was not that the person wore a hood covering its head, or that it dressed in black, but that the garment covering the person was of a style very familiar to me. The gears of my memory turned and clicked into place. The long billowiness, the heavy material, the way the person walked – I’d seen something very similar thirty days ago on New Year’s Eve. I’d almost forgotten the encounter, but here was a very lively reminder.

Whether this was the same person or not, I couldn’t tell. Then again, how many cloaked individuals wandered the streets of New York City, looking like they were on their way to a Renaissance Faire? I wondered if this person had a sword hidden under its cloak as well. It was hard to tell, the cloak was big and bulky.

What was this person doing here? Was he, or she, still looking for whatever had eluded it last month? Surely it couldn’t have been me, I thought with a sigh of relief. Regardless of how many people were here, I’m sure he or she would have seen me. It’s not like I was being overly stealthy.

Thirty days ago, I’d been terrified of this strange individual, fearful it was going to run me through with its sword. I had just been breaking the law only moments before, so the left over adrenaline from that didn’t help the situation. Here, dozens of people came through the park all the time, no matter where you went. It would be hard for him, or her, to do anything with so many people around.

As a last minute decision, my curiosity peeked, I followed after the figure. No one else around seemed to give the person a second look. A terrifying thought entered my head. What if I was the only one who could see this person? Perhaps he, or she, was all in my imagination. Could this be some kind of figment? What if this was just the start of some kind of mental illness?

Then I saw someone’s dog bark at the person’s leg and the owner apologize. I began to breathe a bit easier. Not a figment, then. I didn’t particularly like the idea of the possibility of me going crazy. I shook my head to clear it and continued following, trying not to walk too closely.

In my effort to not appear to be on the same path as the dark figure, the distance between us grew as his longer legs took him farther with each step. Though not overly tall, at least by a grown man’s standards should he be indeed a he, the person was definitely taller than me. I tried to keep up and still remain nonchalant about it, but it was becoming increasingly difficult, especially as joggers and bikers and dog owners got in the way.

I followed him over the bridge, to the southern part of the park. Where the heck was he going? I had started thinking of the stranger as a ‘he’ in my head. For some reason, the person just seemed more like a male to me. Even despite its shortness.

Suddenly, around the area of the carousel, a crowd of people showed up, moving through the now huge gap that had formed between me and my prey. As I was unfortunately on the short side, I had a hard time seeing him around the crowd. When at last the crowd dispersed, I looked around to see my quarry had disappeared.

Stunned, I turned in every direction, spinning around in a circle like a lost child that couldn’t find his parent. I spun several times, as if believing the next spin would finally locate a black cloak heading away from me. Confused as to how he eluded me, I continued on southward, believing he must have gone this way. As I walked, I kept turning around, almost expecting him to pop up again from any direction. Maybe I’d overtaken him in the crowd? Maybe I should go back and check out the carousel? I dismissed that; I highly doubted a man like that would be interested in a children’s ride.

I had nearly reached the southern exit, passing along the pond, when I finally decided to give up. The whole idea had been stupid anyway, I told myself. I didn’t know what I hoped to accomplish. Did I expect to follow him back to see him capture whoever, or whatever, he’d been after? Or maybe I thought I’d see a sword fight. What century did I think I lived in, anyway? Only Japanese samurai or English fencers knew how to swordfight.

Feeling oddly disappointed, I ducked my head as yet another cold burst of icy wind pounded against me. Someone yelled something not far off, echoing down one of the nearby staircases. I looked up to see a blur of something fly at me just before the wind suddenly knocked out of my stomach. The force sent me sliding on the ice of the path. I flailed to stay upright for all of a millisecond, then crashed to the pavement, limbs sprawling every direction, landing with a resounding crack on my butt.

Ouch. Dizzy and winded, with several aching muscles, I gingerly lifted myself into a sitting position, leaning back on my elbows. “What the f-”

The words died on my lips as I came face to face with a pair of vivid sky blue eyes. The blue eyes stared at me, large in a small pale grubby little face, framed by long lashes. Shocking red hair peeked out from underneath a woolen hat. A tiny body connected with the tiny head, dressed in some kind of large overcoat and mismatched gloves, the colors of which had been faded from a hot pink and a bright orange.

The full weight of the child pressed against my gut. In hands that had once been delicately manicured, but now chipped and a little broken, was an apple and a saran wrapped sandwich. I pushed the kid off so I could breathe better. “Jeez, kid, what the hell?”

A tiny mew turned my attention to a medium-sized gray stripped cat sitting next to me and staring at me with the same look as the girl. Its tail swished agitatedly, staring with the strange intelligence of most cats. I swore that this cat understood more than most as it gave me almost an evil eye and growled a little in its throat. Tentatively, I rubbed my head, trying to see if the fall had knocked my head as well.

The girl continued to stare as I brushed the hair behind my ears. Her eyes widened as she saw my ears. Half expecting her to scream or something, I grimaced in disgust at her gawking.

Instead, a slight smile formed on her lips. “O’vi ber jhoji ti!”

My jaw dropped. What the hell was that? “Huh?”

Then I heard the shouts again. Closer. I looked down at the little girl, seeing again the food in her hands. Shit. The kid must have stolen it. By the looks of her pale complexion and thin face, and the overall appearance of her clothes, this obviously homeless girl had been hungry and got caught lifting something to eat. As ticked off as I’d been about being bowled over, I couldn’t look down at those baby blues and not feel a pang of sympathy. I knew all too well the desperation of hunger.

Thinking quickly, I lifted the girl from the ground and shuffled her over to a rocky outcropping next to the path. A small recession in the rock was nearly obscured by all the snow piled up in front of it. As I helped her climb into the hole, the cat following after and jumping neatly into the hole behind her, I realized the girl carried a rough canvas knapsack on her back. All her worldly possessions, no doubt. Giving her one final look and placing a hushed finger to my lips, she nodding seriously back at me, I turned back to the path, attempting to appear blasé and laid back.

Not a moment later, two police officers and what looked one of the street vendors came rushing around the corner into view.

“You there!” One of the officers called out to me.

I feigned confusion. “What? Me?” Casually I jumped over the snow drift and joined the officers on the path, fortunately landing without slipping. Keeping my eyes focused entirely on the men before me, I watched to make sure they hadn’t seen the girl still hiding in the hole.

“Yes, you,” the officer replied, obviously not amused by my cheek. “Did you see a young girl run by here?”

“This high,” the other officer supplied, using his hand to simulate her relative height. “Probably about three or four years old.”

I scratched my head. “Yeah. Kid nearly ran me over. I think she ran that way.” I pointed up the path behind me. “Probably towards the carousel. Seemed to be that direction.”

The first officer nodded. “Thanks.” He glanced at me again over his sunglasses. “Shouldn’t you be in school, son?”

Crap. One of the many downfalls of looking like I was thirteen was that everyone assumed I must still be in school. Ignoring the fact I’d never gotten a high school diploma, I probably had more schooling and knew more than most eighteen year olds combined. This wouldn’t be the first time a cop stopped me for being out and about on a school day. Over the years I developed a system for dealing with these types of questions. “No, sir. I’m home schooled.”

The cop nodded and the three of them took off down the path, after one last clarification from me the direction to go in. I started walking the other way, gesturing towards the hidey hole for the girl to sit tight.

Slowly I walked off down the path, giving the men time to wander off deeper into the park. When I thought I’d gone far enough, I turned around to find the men had gone from sight. Jogging back to the rock, I looked around quickly to check who was around before I pulled the girl out.

The cat popped out after the girl, watching me with something akin to suspicion. I glared down at the cat as I carefully placed the girl on her feet. What was its problem? The cat must have belonged to the girl, as it seemed overly protective of her. Strange behavior for a cat.

Ignoring the cat, I turned my attention back to the girl. She continued to stare up at me with those wide, innocent eyes of hers, an almost reverent, awed expression. I shifted uncomfortably in her gaze. “You okay?”

Still gazing up at me, her tiny head nodded. “Ai't tholi.”

I scratched my head at her babble. “Uh, okay. Good. You know,” I said, putting on my best lecture tone, “you shouldn’t steal.”

With that, the girl went off on a tirade of babble, exploding with tiny fury. She stamped her little feet, gesturing at me, at the men who were looking for her, at the sky. She pounded her head with her fists and rolled her eyes. I was taken aback by the display. Worried she might hurt herself, I grabbed her hands to stop her.

“Okay, okay! I get it. You didn’t steal anything.” Her head nodded emphatically, chin out defiantly. I supposed I wasn’t the right one to be lecturing on theft anyway. It sounded a bit hypocritical coming from me. It’s not like I was the pillar of society, following the rules and laws.

Her tirade done with, huffing one final time from my injustice, the girl watched me expectantly. I shifted uncomfortably again. Great, now what? I saved her from being picked up by the cops, but to what end? By the looks of her, she seemed like a three year old, a tiny three year old. What would a kid so young be doing on her own without supervision? A horrid tightening formed in my stomach. I swallowed.

Did she not have anyone to take care of her?

Perhaps it would have been better for the cops to find her. They could have taken her some place where she could be cared for. No child, especially one this small, should be on their own.

I knelt down to her level and took her tiny hands in mine. Her eyes followed my movement, full of trust. Hissing sharply, the cat poked its head between us, and I could swear it glared at me with its golden-slotted cat eyes. It startled me and I jerked back slightly.

“Wex!” the girl admonished the cat. “Ci'm eil aer. Ai ser cos.” Tiny hands on her hips, her face scrunched up in fury, she made an intimidating figure for one so small. The cat, Wex apparently, blinked at her once, then sat back and began to clean its paws.

I stared at the cat, a befuddled expression muddling my features. Did the cat actually listen to her? Turning back to the girl, she smiled at me almost apologetically and took my hands again. Her eyes still gave me that googly, trusting expression.

Deciding to once again ignore the strange cat, I asked, “Where are your parents? Do you have anyone looking for you?” I looked at her mismatched attire, faded but not overly dirty. God, how long has she been out here on her own? I shuddered just thinking about it.

Her tiny face scrounged up, her lower lip trembling slightly. Oh crap, I made the kid cry. Taking a heavy breath she mumbled, “Shar vaedi.”

I blinked at the strange words. “Okay… I’ll take that as a no.” I sighed, exasperated. “So what do I do with you?”

Tugging on my hands excitedly, the girl started babbling at a rapid pace. Nothing she said made any sense, but the smile on her face and the way she tugged on my arm gave the gist of what she wanted.

I shook my head. “I can’t take you home with me.” Her face scrunched up. “It’s not exactly a good place for little kids.”

Crying in that strange language of hers, she hugged me about the waist, pouting up at me with her big blue eyes.

Those eyes reminded me of something, but I couldn’t figure out what. Staring into them mushed my brain and softened my insides. The longer I looked at her, the stronger the effect. I felt the Good Samaritan in me rear its annoying head. I couldn’t abandon the kid. What the hell was up with me and rescuing girls in distress?

The others were not going to like this.

I sighed, defeated, even as the girl tugged on my sleeve, babbling incessantly. She pointed to me then to herself, several times over. Then she grabbed my ear, pinching the tips. “Hey!” I reached for her hand to pull her off me when she brushed her dusty red hair over her own ear, revealing a tiny, elegant point.

I stared, frozen in my attempts to remove her. “What the hell?”

The girl babbled on, obviously trying to explain something. I just shook my head at her. That’s where I knew those eyes from. They were the same shape and color as my own. Just like the tips of her ears. Never in fifty two years had I ever met anyone else with ears like mine. I glanced from her ears to her eyes, the girl obviously waiting for some kind of understanding from me.

“What are you?” I finally asked in hushed tones.

She rolled her eyes at me, as if it was all so obvious. “Masti eir o. Eil aer.” Muttering under her breath, I heard, “Shar col os aer pyr's ialaesal aelael?”

Swallowing hard, I tried to process this new bit of information. Obviously the girl had to come with me. Could I possibly have finally found someone like me after all these years? If this girl was anything like me, she would age slowly. If she was, she might not even be three, but older! It would make sense as to how a child so young could survive any time alone in the city. Sending her off with the police would land her in the same situation I’d been in – growing up around everyone who’d leave her far behind. I couldn’t put someone else in that situation. No one should have to go through what I went through.

Rising to my full height, I held my hand out to the girl. She took it happily, babbling. “I guess you’re coming home with me.” We started for the park exit. “I can’t keep calling you kid, though,” I thought aloud. I looked down at her. “What’s you name?”

The girl stared up at me, almost confused at my words at first. “Iris,” she said at last.

The ghost of a smile formed on my lips. “Hello, Iris. My name is Konnel.”

She smiled back. “Konnel,” she repeated, and curled into my side, glomping my arm.

As we walked, a question raged in my mind.

What the hell are you, Iris? For that matter, what am I?

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thu, 26 Nov 2009 18:17:44 GMT

Have a Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Pray my mother doesn't kill me with her craziness.

And for those interested, I've posted my last chapter for my nano story. Anyone interested, I can put you on my filter. I just didn't feel comfortable posting the section to everyone.

I wins! dance

Wed, 25 Nov 2009 21:10:33 GMT

I knew I could do it! I've just reached the fabled 50k mark for NaNo! Of course, like so many, I'm no where near finished with this thing. I still haven't written Iris yet!!! I'll get to her before the end of the week, I'm sure. It's the next section.

I don't have a finished section yet, but I may put up the first part of the next chapter later. I think I'm going to have to lock it, as it's got stuff I don't think I want read by most people, but if anyone is interested in reading it, I can unlock it for certain people.

I'm going to keep on writing this until the end of NaNo, see how far I can get. After that...well, I might end up taking a break from it for a while. I have Christmas shopping to do, and I should be finishing my brother and sister-in-law's blanket I've been making for their wedding last May. Plus, I still need to find a job. And there's outfit sewing for the kids! So much to do. I'll probably limit my writing to smaller bursts for a while.

I've loved doing this. I'll think of something to write for next year and do it again. Maybe a sequel?

Forgotten Castles - Chapter 10

Wed, 25 Nov 2009 00:28:53 GMT

I can see the finish line! Only another two thousand two hundred fifty words to go! Give or take. I hope to do a bit more writing before I go to bed tonight, but if not, I'm sure I can hit that 50k mark tomorrow! Then it's all gravy from then on. All that writing and I still haven't gotten to Iris! Damn. I guess Konnel talks too much, lol.

I like what I wrote in this section for the most part, although I'm a bit disappointed by the end of the section. I can make it prettier later.

word count today so far: 2382

I ran. Flat out sprinted, my legs pumped as quick as they could, extending to their fullest length. Even with that, my little legs couldn’t move me fast enough.

Distance. I needed distance, and quick. No where was far enough, though, to escape. I could run to the ends of the earth, to the farthest point in the universe, and it still wouldn’t be far enough. Just as long as I didn’t stand still, it was enough. It was something. A start, at least. With each step, I was somewhere else, and that somewhere else was a million times better than the place I began at.

No, no, must not think about that. Must not think about that place. I smacked the sides of my head as I ran, pressing my palms into my temples in an effort to crush the thoughts, as if it would turn off some switch in my mind to keep the thoughts of “that place” from intruding into my consciousness.

Out! Out! I screamed into my skull, squeezing my eyes shut as extra precaution. It couldn’t get out if I shut myself off completely to it. Two tiny specks of wetness escaped from underneath and rolled down my cheek. No! No! I denied the tears as well. They only gave strength to the thoughts.

Run! Run! Farther! Faster! My thoughts so consumed with continued movement, everything around me faded into a blur of images going passed. I could weave in and out of obstacles, but I didn’t really see them. Obstacles impeded my running and I could not allow that. I didn’t have to look at it, though, in order to avoid it.

My lungs burned from overexertion. Can’t stop, can’t stop. I ignored the pain in my side. I forgot to be afraid about getting lost. I couldn’t get lost; this was my city, I knew it better than any.

I was afraid, though. My whole body hurt from fear. Stop it, stop it! I smacked myself again, punching my fists into the top of my head. I couldn’t be afraid. I wouldn’t be afraid. I didn’t want to remember why I should be afraid. If I wasn’t afraid, it didn’t happen. It couldn’t have happened.

Stop, stop, stop, stop! No thinking! Just running!

My legs started to cramp up, adding to the pain in my side. I tripped, slipping over some loose rocks, but I refused to let myself stay down. As tired as I was, I couldn’t stop. I wouldn’t stop. Yelling and whistles and blaring noises sounded around me, but I ignored them all. I wouldn’t let anything stop me until I was safe.

Safe. I hardly understood the meaning of the word. What was safe? Where did safe exist? Someplace where things didn’t hurt and where I didn’t want to curl into a ball and cry. Where pain and fear couldn’t find me.

Maybe I should get lost, I thought. If I didn’t know where I was, how could anything else find me? If nothing could find me, nothing could hurt me. Was that what safe was? Safe was being hidden. Safe was being…alone?

Alone. The word hurt. It stung my heart, but not nearly as painfully as the alternative. Yes. Alone. The world grew blurrier than before.

No, no, bad tears! I gritted my teeth and angrily wiped my sleeve over my eyes, never slowing down. Tears were the enemy.

The world grew darker. Light dimmed little by little as I tore through the metal jungle of my world. Instinct kept me going on whatever path I’d set for myself. Vision wasn’t necessary, the darkened blurry images still seen in the gloom, even as I ignored them all.

Metal gave way to green. Exhaust fumes gave way to something cleaner, something pure and wild. The noises muffled and retreated. Even my footsteps had become muted, more of a shushing than a clomp.

Still I ran. Everything ached. I felt ready to be torn apart from the inside. Everything would rip open – heart, lungs, ribs, muscles. Pieces of me would be strewn about. A leg to fall off here, an arm to fly off over there. All would burst forth when at last I’d come to the edge of what my body could handle. Until then, I would run.

Something slammed into my feet, knocking the ground from under me. I fell head first, landing on my palms hard, scraping them until tiny pricks of blood began to pool at the surface. I blinked at my hands, then up at where I fell. I’d landed on the bottom of a set of granite stairs. Darkness had descended fully, but I could see the stone tower looming above me.

Wheezing hard, my blood pumping in my ears, I concentrated all my will on rising from my spot and climbing the stairs. My limbs and lungs protested with each movement. I told them I’d rest soon. Almost there, almost.

I managed to climb to the main platform of the castle. I felt woozy and dizzy, the world faintly spinning and tipping me sideways. I tumbled towards the ground, unable to breathe. Slowly I half stumbled, half crawled to the wall, then followed it down to its end, where the castle overlooked the cliff and the pond. By focusing all my efforts into moving my body, I could forget the harrowing flight to get here.

I stumbled around the wall, to the rocky ledge of the castle’s foundation. Using the wall as a guide, I followed it below the main platform. My feet took an unsteady step on one of the precariously stacked rocks. The rock slid out from under my foot, sending me flying onto my backside and down the slope. I reached out with both hands, trying to find something to grab onto, twisting onto my stomach and tearing through both pant legs and knees.

My fingers caught one particularly stable rock and my body nearly pulled my arm from the socket as I finally came to a stop. I hung there a moment, trying to breathe, before forcing my tired body to yet again perform an action beyond its limits. I could feel the scrapes on my chest, legs, arms and face and I knew they should hurt. My body felt too numb for pain.

Until I attempted to climb back up the slope. The pain that lanced through my arm brought tears and a cry from me. I pushed through the pain, determined not to be beaten. Slowly, I crawled back up. The corner of the one wall beckoned me like a life preserver. I scrambled up the last few inches and scuttled to the corner, where I huddled into a little ball, knees folded against my chest.

I wheezed hard, practically hyperventilating, as I rocked back and forth in my ball. My head dipped between my legs, hiding myself more fully from anything around me. Before I knew it, my gasping wheezes turned into rasping sobs. Once it began, I couldn’t stop it, rocking and sobbing, wheezing and crying. Huge tears spilled down to plop into the dry rock below me.

All the pain started throbbing at once. The cuts and scratches that still bled. The aches in my side and in my legs. My chest burned from lack of oxygen. I could feel the bruise on my arm from earlier more clearly than ever. I didn’t need to look at it to know it would look like a hand print. It still felt like a hand.

I cried. I bawled. Everything inside me felt washed with tears. All my insides would flow out of me with them. Something inside needed to get out. I felt almost possessed, and by crying I would exercise it out.

God, God, why? I cried, my mind screaming the way my voice could not. God, God, please! Help!

God couldn’t hear me. God didn’t care. He couldn’t help. Praying to Him did no good.

God was a fraud.

God let this happen.

OhGodohGodohGodohGodohGod…

An invisible hand squeezed on my heart, my chest tightening. I cried harder, my head throbbing, but I couldn’t stop. At least the pain in my head kept other hurtful thoughts out. The only thought that got through was whywhywhywhywhy? Over and over again.

It didn’t seem fair. I wouldn’t let thoughts intrude as to why I was here, but the pain it caused continued, no matter how I denied it. It seemed to me that if God were truly benevolent, He wouldn’t have left me with this much pain.

For the first time in my life, I prayed for death.

I must have cried myself to sleep, for the next thing I knew a pair of arms had wrapped themselves around me. My heart leapt to my throat and panic whirred in my blood. I cried out, the touch as gentle as it was breaking down the barrier I placed on my mind to bring back horrible memories. Nononononono! Quickly, I sprang away, sliding precariously on the stones, to huddle away from the arms, whimpering softly with my arms held protectively around me.

“My God, Konnel, what happened to you?”

The voice came out warm and soothing, like honey. The fear in the pit of my stomach released. I looked up into the concerned face of Sister Josephine. Even in the pitch dark, I saw how wide and red her eyes were. They were shiny from moisture. She wasn’t wearing her usual habit, but dressed in regular everyday wear, though her light brown spring jacket had streaks of dust and little pulls in the thread.

“Shh, shh, it’s okay. I’m here. It’s okay.” Slowly she crawled over to me, and I watched her, feeling something like one of those wild animals on nature shows, cornered and ready to flee. I stayed put as she closed the gap between us and pulled me into her arms again, even though my instincts had been to run and hide.

It’s Sister, I told myself, and I let her pull me onto her lap. She would never hurt me. My head still hurt from when I’d cried myself to sleep, but laying it against Sister somehow made it feel better. Rhythmically she pet my head, slow and soft, making me almost sleepy.

“We were so worried about you. Somehow, I knew you’d be here, though. It’s where I found you as a baby, did I tell you?” I shook my head. “Are you hungry?” I didn’t know how to respond to that. My stomach had been in knots for hours. The pain in my stomach could have been because of hunger, but there was still a queasiness about it, too. Food didn’t sound like something I could handle. I shook my head.

Sister sighed. “I should probably get you home. Steve has been worried sick –”

I jerked as a stab of fear pierced my chest and I flailed, trying to shove Sister away from me. Nononononono- “NO!” I screamed.

Surprised, Sister’s grip on me loosened and I fell from her lap, toppling over onto the rocks and cutting myself again. I clutched at my head, bad thoughts intruding. I could see them even with my eyes closed. A hand on my arm, the water in the tub, clothes on the floor, Steve’s face near mine…

I continued to scream aloud. “Nononononono!”

“Angels and Saints, Konnel! Blessed Father, what has happened to this boy?”

I felt hands on my shoulders, trying to push me. Retrain me. Hold me down. I wouldn’t let them! Never again! I fought, tooth and nail, against the hands that held me.

“Konnel! Konnel!”

The voice rose in pitch, frantic. I froze, panic still welling up inside but knowing I was fighting the wrong person. I stared into Sister Josephine’s face, her eyes staring back at me, frightened. “He said you’d been getting worse. He said you’ve been like this ever since Mary died.”

Mary. Dear, sweet Mary. Killed by a drunk driver while walking home from work over a year ago. How I wished I could go to her, but she couldn’t have helped me even if she was still alive. She didn’t know. It happened right under her nose. Now she was dead, and she couldn’t save me.

“I told him you weren’t a violent boy.” Her voice soothed me, even as the fear raged on. Listening to her voice kept the fear at bay. “He says he doesn’t blame you for what you did, he still wants you to come home.”

Home. I didn’t have a home. A home was supposed to be a place of love and safety, not a place of fear and uncertainty.

God, I could still feel his breath on my neck! I shivered.

“Konnel?” Sister’s voice started to wobble. “Konnel, please talk to me.”

My heart broke to hear her so upset. I continued to stare at her as she gently pet my face, her eyes filling up with tears. I swallowed a huge knot. “I. C-can’t. Go. Home.” I pronounced each word carefully, trying to keep it steady so the sound of my own fear wouldn’t send me into convulsions again. “I. C-c-can’t.”

Sister’s eyes searched mine, trying to find answers, but I’d closed the answers behind a steel door in my head. “Why? What happened? Did you really scratch Steve in the face?”

I glanced down at my fingers. Under the nails was drying blood. It wasn’t my own, I knew that much. The events that led up to that started forming in my head and I scrunched up my face against the images, roughly running my fingernails on my pant legs to brush off the blood. If it wasn’t there, I wouldn’t be reminded.

Sister stopped my hands, laying hers on top of mine. “Konnel, what happened?” I shook my head. “Please tell me.” I shook my head again, more vehemently. I couldn’t talk about it, I wanted to forget it.

My brain refused to comply with that request. More images popped up, despite trying to think of anything else. I cringed and whimpered as they came to me. …Must…not…remember…!

Steve standing behind me. The sound of his breathing. The touch of his hands. The heat of the water. Lips on my skin. It was like reliving it. Every sensation was so vivid, like it was still there. A whining noise started up and I realized that was me. I didn’t want to go through it again!

The images wouldn’t stop. Now that they’d been released, I couldn’t hold them back. Rage. I raged. I screamed at them to stop. How dare they come to me unbidden! They would obey me!

I remembered rage. Rage filled with fear. My hands were weapons, and they lashed out, scratching, tearing. My teeth bit and the hand released me. I kicked and punched, connecting. What only moments before had been rigid and upright, now had a permanent crook from where my foot had landed, the force a crushing blow. The satisfaction of doing it lasted only a moment until fear took over again. Before the retaliation could begin, I grabbed my clothes and ran.

Stop! Stop! “Stop!” I screamed in my head and out loud. It hurt my throat, but screaming felt good. I screamed. Remembering my rage, I held on to it. The rage would protect me. I screamed and raged, forcing the images back until I no longer felt inside them. I pushed them out, determined to never again let them take me over. Fear would not rule me.

I stared at my fear, standing across from me, watching me as I watched it. We face each other, we knew each other. No. With one giant push, I shoved it and the images into the back of my mind. I could still see it, I knew it was there, but it didn’t control me.

Taking a shaky breath, I realized Sister Josephine held me tightly in her arms, her voice whispering softly but frantically. As I came back to full awareness, I could make out the words she spoke. “Please Lord God, help this child. Jesus Christ, son of the father, bless this boy with strength to fight his demons. Mary, mother of God, look after him in this his hour of need.” Her prayers continued at a hurried, breathless pace and never once did she stumble over her words, as if reciting a memorized script.

I relaxed into her arms even as a bitter resentment filled me at her words. If God had only helped me before, Sister Josephine wouldn’t have to pray now for me. He’d let me down, and He let Sister down.

Sister must have noticed I had calmed down as she stopped her litany of prayers. “Konnel?”

“Please, can you take me home with you?” I asked, slowly speaking each word. “I c-can’t go back with S-st…him.” I couldn’t say his name. I just couldn’t.

“Sure, Konnel.” Sister lifted me up in her arms and crossed back over the rocks to the castle wall. She carried me easily enough, and I clung to her until my knuckles turned white. “I hope one day you can talk to me about this.”

No, I wouldn’t. How can you talk about something when there are no words for the terror you felt, or the pain you suffered? To put words to the images gave them more power.

How could I tell her it wasn’t the first time?

As she carried me away, I closed my eyes, praying my dreams wouldn’t include the lusting eyes of Steven Bailey.

Cheer!

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 07:01:59 GMT

I found Poppy's ear!

My little puki was all set to go to the meet today, until I noticed she only had one of her kitty ears on her head. I had no idea she'd even been wearing them, they blend in with her wig, so I didn't notice it was missing until I saw the one and checked for the other. I thought I looked all over the area, on my bed, near her chair where she sits. I couldn't find it. She had to go to the meet without her ears, and had to borrow Malinda's ws calico painted ears.

I was just about to go to bed, pulled up the covers to slide my feet under, when there I saw Poppy's other ear! I could have cheered out loud - but I would have woken up Mom.

Now if only I can find Nardakk's wedding band.

Le sigh

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 06:52:46 GMT

Not like it was a huge surprise, but no gaming occurred again tonight. And next week Alissa is off to her family for the holiday. Bummer. Now it'll be another two weeks before we can give it another go. At least by that point, the NaNoWriMo will be over. I doubt the novel will be finished, but the month of crazy writing will be behind me. I'll take some time for going over the adventure a little more, maybe coming up with some stuff for the Demon Slayer's campaign.

As for nano, the meet kind of squashed any posibility of writing today. I'm at 41,224 words, and even though I wanted to be at 42,000 by today, that's not too bad. Tomorrow I want to get to 44,000 - we'll see how much I can get done before I go to the gym with Malinda. I'm so exhausted, so I don't think I can take trying to do anything tonight. I probably won't even try to get up early in the moring. Or maybe I will.

So, good-night.

Forgotten Castles - Chapter 9 Part One

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 07:45:30 GMT

I've only finished part of this chapter. Oddly enough, I actually had a lot of fun writing this part, and it wasn't a depressed Konnel section! Amazing!

Oh, be aware, there's drug use in this section.

word count today: 2550

Trying to move through the crowd at Times Square was like trying squeeze yourself through a vat of thick sticky caramel. No matter how much you shove, you’re only going to move a few inches, and even then there’s the chance of being sucked back. Thousand upon thousands of New Yorkers and tourists jammed themselves into the several streets around Broadway and Seventh, many of them having found themselves a place the night or two before.

I always though that kind of dedication was crazy. Okay, maybe I’ve slept in line for a concert before, but sleeping on the streets never bothered me. But to stand around all day so you have a spot to see something that could be seen from nearly any spot in the area? That I didn’t understand. Although, being a bit on the short side, I suppose some prior planning to find a place where I would not be covered by taller people might not have been so crazy.

At least being small and wiry allowed me to pass through the crowd relatively easier than most. I just had to worry about catching my bag on someone. Holding the bag protectively in front of me, I shimmied my way through all the cracks between people I could find. Crowd surfing, New York style. I had to admit, though, all the people crammed into the area made the air a bit warmer, even as the snow continued to fall. I wondered if it would fall all night.

Although I could barely see around me for all the people, I knew this area by memory. By following the angle of the buildings high above me, I could plot my course through the rough sea of merry, and in some cases drunk, New Year revelers – much like sailors of old used the stars to guide themselves through stormy waters.

After pushing through what seemed like miles of people, leaving several angry in my wake, I could see by the M&M sign across the street that I was close to my destination. I ducked under a fat guy’s arm, between two gossiping college girls and narrowly avoided getting kicked by a little girl as she was swung up onto her father’s shoulders. I glared at the kid, though part of me felt a pang of jealousy.

Then I saw him. Below the giant poster for Phantom of the Opera stood Justin, leaning against a light post. I pissed off a few more people in my effort to reach him and finally I popped through the last obstacle, coming to stand next to my roommate.

Justin looked down, sensing my arrival. His face broke into a grin. “Hey, there you are! Glad the crowd didn’t suck you into its vortex.”

“They tried,” I replied, taking another section of the lamp post to lean against. “Where are the others?” The noise around us was at such a din, what with party favors and car horns and police sirens and everyone trying to talk at the same time, I had to practically shout to Justin, even with him standing right next to me.

“Uh, well, you know Sebastian and Tamica won’t be joining us.” I nodded. The two of them were having a “private” party, celebrating the New Year at a hotel, I think. All us guys had a feeling he might be asking her to marry him. He’d been acting kind of nervous all week. It was a romantic night to pop the question. I hoped it went well for them.

“I haven’t seen Jenny or Cora,” Justin went on, “but Bobby went to get some munchies for us. Have you eaten dinner yet?”

I shook my head, hoping to conserve my voice for any yelling that might occur during the course of the celebrations. “I figured I’d grab a hot dog or something from a vendor.”

Justin chuckled. “If you can find one. They kind of get lost in this mass of people.”

“I noticed.” This wasn’t my first time spending New Years in Times Square. I’d done it several times over the years. Usually I do it for the poignant years – new decade, or if I had a new birthday decade to celebrate. You can bet I’d be here for the Millennium, for instance. However, none of my roommates had ever been, so even though the year would only be 1996, I had no problem joining them in ushering in another year and pretending like it was something special.

Well, it was my first New Year with Jenny, so I guess that counts as something special.

The two of us chatted while we waited for the others. Justin asked how crew rehearsal went and I asked how Sebastian looked before he and Tamica left for their evening. We tossed about more ideas on how we thought he might propose when Bobby showed up. His wide, triumphant grin had the two of us share a look of mild worry. Bobby looking triumphant often meant he’d done something he maybe shouldn’t have.

“So, did you get us some eats, or what?” Justin asked hesitantly.

Bobby grunted the affirmative. “Not just that.” He shifted and I could see he carried not one, but two large plastic bags, plus a foam cup holder, containing four large drinks. He handed that, plus one of the bags to Justin, the one that stated it had come from S’barros. The intoxicating smell of pepperoni pizza wafted out of the bag. My mouth started to water. Damn, I was starving.

“Nice choice,” I said.

From the other bag, Bobby produced a bottle of soda, which he handed off to me, and then a short stack of plastic cups. Those he handed to me as well. “Thought once the sodas ran out, we could drink some of that.”

“Jesus,” Justin muttered, staring agog at Bobby, “how much crap did you buy? Is this why you were gone so long?”

“I figured we’d be here for a couple of hours, and we’d need supplies.” The triumphant grin returned in full force. “Plus, I got us…these.”

Like a magician during the final reveal, Bobby removed a plastic water bottle with a bendy straw from the second bag. From the looks of it, as I glanced down into it, it was only one of several. “Ta da!” Jeez, he even had the cheesy magician’s vocabulary.

“A water bottle?” I sneered. “So what?”

“So what?” Bobby’s jaw dropped and he stared at me like I’d scoffed at chocolate cake or something. “So what? Here, take a sip.”

I raised an eyebrow and gave an annoyed glance down at my full hands. Sighing with exaggeration, he shoved the straw practically up my nose. More than a little irritated, I humored him and took a sip.

I coughed violently as the liquid burned down my throat. “Holy shit,” I coughed, “did you put alcohol in there?” I whispered the word ‘alcohol’ in case anyone nearby was paying us too much attention. Whether Bobby heard what I said as a result, I don’t know, but he obviously must have gathered I figured out his master plan.

“Isn’t it great?” His grin grated on my nerves. “Even if a cop should go by, they won’t have a clue. I mean, what’s the New Year without a little bubbly?” He shook the bottle for emphasis. “And don’t worry, fruity boy,” he added to me, “I got a wine cooler in here, too. Each one has a different beverage.”

Justin shrugged at me. “Not a bad idea.”

Bobby grinned at us. “I know, right?”

Trying to find a little bit of sidewalk to plunk down our supplies, we started passing around the food. As we took stock of all Bobby had brought us, I heard female voices calling our names.

“Konnel! Bobby! Justin!”

We looked up and saw Cora and Jenny, only a few feet away, jumping up and down and waving frantically at us. Together, we organized the people around us to allow them to pass without too much fuss.

“Thanks,” Jenny said in relief once she reached us. “It’s kind of scary out there.”

“Sorry we’re a bit late,” Cora said. “We stopped for munchies.” She held up giant bags of potato chips and cheese doodles. “Ooo, pizza!” Cora dropped to the floor to grab one of the pizza slice boxes.

“Plus,” Jenny added, “it wouldn’t be a new year’s party without silly hats and party favors!” She took out a tiara with the numbers ‘1996’ emblazoned on it and stuck it on her head. It made her look like a prom queen. Kinda cute.

My grin faded as a second one came out of the bag. Jenny smirked at me. “Oh no, you’re not getting that on me.”

Jenny giggled and reached for my head. I attempted to defend myself, though my attempts were half-hearted at best, and I found myself laughing as well. “Come on, do I have to?”

“Aww, but I bought it just for you!”

The guys snickered at me as I stood there, giant sparkly purple tiara on my head. I glared at the two of them. “Don’t you dare say anything,” I warned them. Their only reply was an increase in snickers. God damn I hated them sometimes.

“Smile!”

Confused, I turned back to Jenny. All I saw was a bright white light and then nothing. “Jenny!” I wined, blinded from the camera flash. I heard her giggle some more. Slowly my vision returned.

Cora looked up at us from the ground. “Hey, why is Konnel wearing my crown?”

I raised an eyebrow to Jenny. Her giggles only grew and she tried to hide behind Bobby. “I thought it looked cute on you.” Quickly she hid her camera in her purse.

“Blackmail photos,” Justin said with a respectful nod at Jenny.

Cora popped back up, pizza in one hand, and ripped the tiara off my head. “Mine. We bought you boys something else.”

Bobby and Justin groaned with me as the girls brought out three identical plastic top hats that all read ‘1996’, just like the girls’ tiaras. Obviously they’d gotten them in the same store, as the colors matched. I took mine with minimal reluctance and groaning, like a good boyfriend. Bobby took his after Cora bullied him. She often bullied him and was good at it. For some reason, Bobby had a soft spot for the kid.

Once the four of us were decked out in our New Year’s finest, Justin laughed himself silly before taking his own hat, saying he only did it to keep us guys from looking too stupid. I appreciated his patronization.

“Okay, group picture!” Jenny produced her camera again and had us all squish together. Holding the camera as far as her arms would go, she leaned her head on my shoulder and pressed down the button.

“Would you like me to take one for you?”

One of the many people around us turned toward our group. The woman looked to be of early middle age, still youthful and pretty in an older way. The woman next to her was probably her daughter. Jenny practically bounced with excitement as she handed her camera over. “Thanks!”

After the brief explanation on now to work the camera, Jenny squished between me and Bobby, grabbing my arm and giving me an excited kiss on the cheek before putting her head back on my shoulder. The flash went off twice, red-eye reduction obviously on. The woman called for one more, and the double flash blinded me again. Spots began swimming before my eyes and I blinked trying to get my vision back.

“Thank you so much!” Jenny said as she took back her camera. She returned it to her purse.

Cora passed out the noise makers to each of us. I put mine in my pocket so I could finally eat my pizza. Oh man, so good! I practically inhaled the slice I was so hungry. I bent to take another slice.

I watched Jenny as she fought her pizza for its cheese, the string growing longer the more she pulled on it. All I could think about was how cute it made her. She looked up from her pizza, catching me in the act of watching her. Color rose on her cheeks and she daintily swallowed the bite she’d finally managed to take. “What?” She had a shy but confused smile on her face.

I looked off over the crowd, a little embarrassed by having been caught. “Nothin’.”

Her smile turning coy, Jenny snuggled under my free arm to lean against my side. A warm, happy feeling burned in me, and I put my arm across her shoulder. I couldn’t even feel the snow on my face anymore. The wind didn’t feel as cold either.

Soon the pizza slices had been eaten and we settled in for the wait. Only a few more hours until the new year. You could feel the buzz of excitement vibrate around us as the hour grew nearer and nearer.

“Any one up for checking out an after New Year party?” Bobby asked.

“Where?” Justin asked. “It’s not like we could get into a club or something. Even if you, me and Jenny could somehow convince them we’re twenty-one, there’s no way they’d be convinced by Konnel and Cora.”

“Even if I am over twenty-one,” I added. The warmth of being near Jenny kept the queasy feeling from attacking my insides like it usually did.

Bobby shrugged. “There are private parties I’m sure we could get to. You in?”

Justin gave me a look. I shrugged back at him. “A party might be fun,” Jenny said tentatively.

“I wanna party!” Cora exclaimed.

“Maybe we should send Cora home if we go,” Justin suggested.

“Oh hell no!” Cora stared at Justin with her no-nonsense bully look normally saved for Bobby. “You’re not leaving me behind. I’m a big girl and no one tells me what I can and can’t do.”

“I still don’t like it,” he responded.

“Duly noted.”

“So if we’re gonna party,” Bobby continued, “I got a little something to add to the fun.” He gestured for us to come closer and with us surrounding him, he produced a small plastic baggie containing a few small, white pills. “I thought I’d splurge on tonight’s entertainment.”

Justin glanced up from the bag to Bobby. “I don’t know, Bobby. Last time we did that, I felt kind of funny afterward.”

“Then don’t do it.”

“Couldn’t we just…you know.” He mimed smoking a joint.

Bobby scowled darkly. “Are you crazy!? With all these people and authority figures around? Besides, this stuff will work better for tonight.”

“I’m game!” Cora stuck her hand in the bag and removed one of the white pills. Justin had that disapproving face about him and before he could try and convince her not to, Cora downed the pill with a large gulp of soda. Justin frowned sternly.

Jenny took two out from the bag and handed one to me. I glanced at Justin. He sighed and took a pill from the bag.

“I don’t want to force you, dude,” Bobby said. “I didn’t have to share.”

Justin didn’t respond, but took the pill with the rest of us.

Fail

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 06:17:24 GMT

Obviously we fail at trying to game.

I guess there's always tomorrow. Here's to hoping.

Procrastination's the name of the game

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:20:40 GMT

*smacks hand* Bad me. I've written nothing as of yet for today. Been procrastinating like crazy! My "errand" didn't help. In fact, it made it much worse as it gave me fuel for my procrastination.

Hello!

She may be cute, but she's horrible for keeping focus. I just had to take her out for a quick photoshoot. I told myself it was just to check to make sure she fit in it all right...and she does...

So when's the snow get here?

Mush, Cookie!

Turn! Turn!

I think it's broke.

Over on DoA as well: http://www.denofangels.com/forums/showthread.php?t=337538

After months and months...

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:15:35 GMT

...It looks like we're finally gaming tonight. Technically we were supposed to game last weekend. And the Friday the weekend before that... Obviously we've slacked off. It's always so hard to get back into the swing of things when we've had such a long hiatus. And if we're gaming tonight, it's got to be one of my games, as Malinda refuses to game on Fridays now. We used to switch off. I liked it better. 'Course, we also used to have a reasonably set schedule, changeable should a new idea occur for a non-sched campaign, but stuck to pretty successfully. No idea what the heck happend.

I would like to do the Shackled City campaign tonight, as we haven't done it in ages. Of my two campaigns, we've spend more time on the Demon Slayer campaign. Not that I haven't been enjoying playing Tag - I love that boy. But I miss Zip and Dip. And everyone's married! Lots of stuff is going to happen. Plus, I got ziltch for the other campaign. At least Shackled City has a campaign book that I get to cheat off of. I just need to read up on what the hell is supposed to be happening. Urgh. Do I have enough time to read up the adventure, get bad guys prepared, make sure my character sheets are up-to-date ('cause I know they're not), and still have enough time to write another 1200 words on my nanowrimo for today? I should be at 40,000. Plus, seeing as how we're going to a doll meet tomorrow, it would be better if I wrote more than 1200 to help accomodate for the fact I won't have time to write tomorrow.

My head's spinning from all that.

Okay, gonna buckle down. Get stuff done. No slacking off. There's only so much time in the day, and I need to utilize all of it. And at some point I need to figure out who the hell is going tomorrow and dress them in something cute. Oh boy.

*collapse*

Forgotten Castles - Chapter 8

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 06:50:06 GMT

So I apparently I need to write more often at one in the morning. I seemed to hit my stride last night. Maybe my muse was really happy last night. Maybe leaving him with his kid, as well as his woman, has left him with enough energy to inspire me. Or maybe I was just so loopy from lack of sleep I just wrote any old thing. Whatever it was, I think this section is way better than several of my previous sections.

word count today: 2665
final word count from yesterday: 2172

Freshly showered, I locked the apartment and headed for the subway. Slung across my shoulder, I had a small side satchel. I took the steps two at a time, my heavy clomping echoing down the stairwell. The constant spiral downward almost had me dizzy by the time I reached the bottom. Sunset had already sent a brilliant scarlet across the sky and dusk fast approached. Good. Darkness would make my job easier.

I passed my usual subway entrance and jogged on to the next. Not as many people used this stop and I jumped the toll station. I had a bunch of tokens, but why use them if I didn’t have to?

Hardly paying any attention to where I was going, I stopped at the first station I came to. Only two other people waited for the train. Casually, I leaned against a nearby brace, attempting not to look in either one’s direction, just as they ignored me. Ah, the sign of a true New Yorker: determined avoidance of eye contact.

The air smelled stale and close, like all subway stations. It was warm and stung my eyes a bit, but I was used to it. At least in the winter the warmth was a bit of a reprieve from the biting city winds. It sucked in the heat of summer. Not to mention the smell stank worse than ever. Like rotting garbage and pee.

I leaned farther into the beam, pushing my hat lower on my face as if trying to hide myself under it. Funny how in a city of twenty-six million, everyone just wants to blend in and hide. I contemplated taking out my discman and listening to some tunes, to further isolate myself, but I wondered if it was worth the effort. Plus, it would make it harder to listen for the train.

Ah, fuck it. It’s not like my eyes weren’t working. Trying to be as oblivious as possible to the two others on the platform, I quickly rifled through my bag and pulled out my headphones, the plug already connected with the player. Leaving the player in bag, I pressed ‘Play’ and slid the headphones over my ears.

What had I been listening to last again? No sooner had I thought the question, but the answer came in the form of those four most famous of notes: Dun dun dun duuuun. Beethoven’s Fifth. I had to stop myself from attempting to pluck them out on an imaginary keyboard. I had to remind myself I was not alone. As it was, I had a hard enough time keeping myself from snorting at my singing along to it in my head.

An old music teacher once taught me the secret to remembering which one was Beethoven’s fifth symphony. You sing the words “Beethoven’s Fifth” to the “dun dun dun duuun” of the first four notes. Oddly enough, it actually works through the whole piece, and I’ve often sung the whole beginning with “Beethoven’s Fifth”.

Classical music was a secret passion of mine. Not even Jenny knew I occasionally listened to it. I kept all my classical CDs, along with a few other artists I’m slightly embarrassed to enjoy, in a separate place from my regular music collection, hidden in a false drawer of my dresser. That music is for my ears only. I shouldn’t have even left the Beethoven CD in the player to begin with, just in case. Don’t ask me why I feel ashamed to listen to something so “cultured”. Maybe it’s the fact that I do hip hop dancing. Maybe it’s the bad boy attitude I try to cultivate. I don’t know.

Maybe it was that if anyone knew, they’d be closer to understanding who I really was. I don’t think I’m ready for anyone to be so intimate with me. I liked being Konnel the bad boy, Konnel the rebel, even Konnel the perv. Beethoven and bad boy didn’t mix.

Whatever. No one needed to know. I just leaned my head back against the beam and enjoyed the music.

The piece had yet to get half way through the first movement, when the train showed up. No one got out and only a few random passengers sat inside each car. The two others and I each got onto three separate compartments. I chose a seat near the door, away from any other passenger, and flopped across two seats, my feet propped up against the handle of the second seat. One or two passengers gave me more than the usual cursory glance and I wondered if they’d seen my ears. Self-consciously, I pulled my hat over their tips. Probably better for keeping them warm anyway.

I got out at the next stop and ran up the steps ahead of the couple of people who got off with me. At the exit, I vaulted over the turnstile once again and raced off before anyone could see me.

Up on the street level, it had grown quite dark since I’d first gone underground. Night had fallen. I gave my surroundings a brief study before choosing a direction. It had been a while since I’d been this way before and had only a vague recollection of which way I needed to go. Not far, at least, if memory served me correctly. I made a few weird turns, doubling back on streets and checking behind me, just to make sure no one had followed me for some reason. I always got a bit nervous right around this point, becoming a bit paranoid.

Then I saw it. Against the one wall of the building across the street stood the ATM machine. After checking for traffic – there was none – I ran across the street. I checked the area as I headed for the ATM. Not a soul in sight. Good. Made life easier.

By this point, the third movement was well under way. My hearing, as well as vision, was crucial at this point, so reluctantly I switched off the discman and shoved the headphones back into the bag. Yanking off my gloves with my teeth, I then began my search, coming to stop a few feet from the machine. In the dimming light of twilight and the sputtering street lamp, I had a difficult time seeing anything inside my bag. I had to rely mostly on feel. Finally my fingers connected with flat plastic. I removed the all white card and stuck it into my jeans pocket. I then returned to the bag, shaking it a bit for good measure, as if what I needed would rise to the surface.

I think I needed to clean out my bag. I had too much shit in it. Like a lady’s purse, I could pull things out of it that one wouldn’t expect to be in there.

In due time, I found the little device and a small tool kit. Those, too, I put in my pocket for safe keeping. The last thing I pulled out was a spray can. I put that between my legs and held it there while I stuck the gloves into the bag and rearranged the bag across my chest. It would be much harder to do this with a pair of thick woolen gloves on, no matter how frosty my fingers felt.

Sliding the bag more onto my butt, I inched forward, removing the spray can and holding it out in front of me. My ears picked up a few distant noises – a dog barking, a car horn, and something that sounded like a firecracker, but none of it came from close by. Once close enough to the machine, I pushed my finger down on the spray button, sending a fine mist across the surface of the ATM. It was only water, but it would fog up any camera built to survey the area. With the night being as chilly as it was, the fog would remain for a good while.

Quickly I knelt down and opened my tool kit. Heart pounding a little, I took one of the mini screwdrivers out and used it to pry the bottom panel partially open. Next I took one of my cutters and a mini flashlight to shine in the hole I made. Finding a wire I liked, I carefully, snipped it and attached it to a wire of my own. This I connected to the little handmade device I had. I made it years ago, though it had gone through many changes and upgrades as technology had developed.

Once punching in my little code, I stood and retrieved the white card from my pants. While the device was handmade, the card I’d acquired from a friend of mine, about the same time I made my little device. Some technology remained the same.

I stuck the card into the card slot and the usual message of a password came up on the screen. I punched in my code, the most recent one I’d developed for hacking into the ATM machines. The fog on the screen started to dissipate from my warm breath. I sucked in a lungful of air and held it, spraying the machine again before the fog disappeared completely. I punched in a few more codes and I saw the message stating how much money I wanted to withdraw. Machines normally had a limit of how much they were authorized to give out to one person on a given day. Sure, I could have developed a code to getting around this limit, but really? Why? There were other days, and this wasn’t the sort of thing I felt I needed to do on a constant basis. I never needed that much.

I punched in five hundred and waited as the machine authenticated my transaction then set about counting out my bills. A few moments later, the little door on the bottom of the machine opened and out popped a small stack of twenties. Hurriedly, I took the money and shoved it into my back pocket. The machine spat out my little white card, wished me a good day, and went back to its greeting for the next customer. I dropped back to the ground, disconnected my device and set about securing the wiring once again. Satisfied that my repair job wouldn’t be readily noticed by anyone but a technician expert, and only if they knew what they were looking for, I screwed the panel shut and shoved my equipment back into my bag.

Sure that by now the mist would have worn off, I scuttled to the side, out of range of the machine’s cameras and reclaimed my gloves. My fingers were stiff from the cold, though so was my butt, having sat in a dingy drift pile. At least my fingers hadn’t cramped up on me while I was setting the codes. It would have definitely messed me up.

I didn’t trust leaving that much cash in my pocket, so I removed the wad and zipped it into a small pocket inside the bag. Just as long as no one tried stealing the bag, the money would be safe from pick pockets.

The adrenaline coursing through my veins had yet to finish with me. Besides the fear of being caught, there was a sort of thrill at gaining access to places I didn’t belong. I wasn’t stupid enough to hack into government programs or facilities, but I had the confidence I could. Only the knowledge that doing so would put me on top of every government security lists kept me from actually doing it. I’d seen enough movies.

Hacking into an ATM was low key, for the most part. I designed my device to make the machine think I was a regular customer. None of the money I took came from any specific cardholder’s account. On paper, everything seems legit. Only an in-depth investigation would reveal that the account never existed. In the end, only the business lost money and no one got hurt.

Or so I kept telling myself. Stealing from a company was still stealing, and stealing was wrong. It was one of God’s Ten Commandments. ‘Thou shalt not steal.’ No idea what number it was. Maybe two? I knew this, and still I did what I did. I’d been doing it for years. Sure, I had a job as a dishwasher with Cora at a nearby bar-slash-restaurant, but working minimum wage, even if it was under the table, didn’t pay the bills.

I had a good bit of money saved up in my very own savings account from all the years I worked as a paper boy, pizza delivery boy, errand boy, and whatever. Over several decades it amassed to quite a bit, even with me going on the occasional splurge for that new game system or what-have-you. I couldn’t touch it, though, not without the activity being noticed by someone looking for me. They’d track me down, bring me back.

I was never going back. Not this time.

Everyone at the apartment knew what I did, but only Justin was absolutely against it. I stopped telling him about it and he stopped asking, but I could sometimes see that look on his face when he realized where I must have gotten the cash to pay for things. Sebastian wasn’t overly thrilled about it, either, but at least realized that it usually helped pay the bills and without it we’d all be out in the cold. Jenny sometimes called me her Robin Hood when I came home after doing a job. I kind of like the idea of equating myself with a noble rogue, righting wrongs, taking from the rich and giving to the poor. Still, until I got a better paying job or could access my savings, this was the best I could do for keeping us all fed and warm. It was just another way for me to justify stealing.

Some day I’d gain control of my savings account again, when those who knew of me no longer existed.

I felt a wrench in my chest and a lump form in my chest at the thought. Determinedly I squashed the feeling, pushing myself up from the wall. I couldn’t stay too long, just in case.

I turned to make my way back across the street and on toward the subway when I heard a strange noise. It couldn’t be too far away, I heard it too clearly. Something like a sucking, splurting sound came from a nearby alleyway. I whirled around, eyes rapidly scanning the area. What the hell had that been?

My heart raced and jumped a little at the sound of clicking footsteps that almost immediately followed the strange sucking noise. Oh crap! The first thought that came into my head was that the cops had seen everything. The footsteps sounded like the nice black shoes police wore.

Well, whatever or whoever it was, I didn’t want to be around for them to find me. I ducked down the first alleyway, diving into the darkness and letting it swallow me as I hid low behind a rusting, smelly metal garbage can.

The footsteps headed my direction. I hesitantly peeked around the garbage can, hoping like hell the shadows would keep me hidden. Thank God my coat was black. I hid my face into the collar of the coat, pushing down my hat even more until I was positive only my eyes were uncovered.

Clip clop, clip clop. Whoever it was, it sounded like he was at a near run down the street. Was he chasing someone? I thought I’d only heard one set of feet. Unless he was looking for me…

I fell further into the shadows at the increasing sounds footsteps echoing down the alley. A moment later, a tall, dark figure stepped into the light in front of my alley. My eyes widened a moment and I practically gasped. Then afraid the gleam of light hitting my eyes would give me away, I squinted, still staring at the stranger.

Dressed all in black, I couldn’t see his face as his head had been covered by the hood of a cloak. I couldn’t even tell if the stranger was male or female, though something about the way he stood and the width of his shoulders made me think male. As if the cloak weren’t weird enough, as the stranger pivoted, obviously confused as to where his prey had gone, the light from a street lamp glistened off of a naked steel blade.

Holy shit! Was that dude carrying a sword?! For a moment, the fear vanished as a wave of confusion and awe took hold of me. I had a great love of swords, though I’d never owned one. Guns disgusted me, especially after having been shot at before, but swords were sleek, refined, graceful. A beautiful symmetry of power and elegance.

I stared at the sword, dazzled by the light shining off the steel. Or was it steel? Did steel glimmer that much? It seemed to shimmer like a mirror, perfect and smooth. No real sword had that much shine to it, and especially not one that was used. There’d be rust or dents or…or blood staining the blade.

Could this guy be some kind of reenactor, like a Civil War reenactor or one of those Live Action people?

Something about his baring led me to believe he wasn’t playacting. He meant business. Even if his sword wasn’t real, it occurred to me that having it plunged into my belly would still be painful, if not deadly. In fact, it would probably hurt more dull than sharp. Fear shivered up my skin and a dull ache started in my stomach as if he’d already struck me through. The question of what someone would be doing in New York City wielding a sword stumbled through my brain again, and only sinister answers whispered back.

I held my breath, quiet as could be, and waited. Why he should have stopped in front of my alley was beyond me. Could it have just been a coincidence? Or had he heard me hide here? I could hear his labored breathing, could he hear mine? Was he looking my way?

A dog barking a few blocks over broke the spell. The stranger turned his head toward the sound. Then I watched him lift his non-sword hand to his hidden face. Something small rested in his palm. A cell phone? Too small, I thought, but he did seem to be talking into it. A greenish glow emanated from his palm and I heard a soft voice, masculine and deep, though I couldn’t hear the words, or if they were even English.

After saying a brief message, he closed his fist and tucked whatever it was back into his pocket. Without glancing back down my alleyway, he turned back the way he came, his feet clomping down the road as fast as he’d come.

Fear kept me glued to my spot until far after the clomping feet had faded. There was no way I was coming out of my alley until I knew that creep had long gone. It took me a minute to realize how hard I was breathing, like I’d been holding my breath the entire time and only now could gulp in air again. My throat hurt from the cold air as it cut down to my lungs.

As I gained control of myself, I cursed, thinking how long I must have been sitting by this garbage. The others must have been in Times Square by now. Still shaking, I looked at my watch. Not nearly as late as I expected it to be. The whole encounter with the stranger took less than ten minutes from start to finish. I thought I had to have been sitting here for an hour, at least. My muscles ached from having to hold my position for so long. Slowly I got to my feet and peeked out from around the corner of my alley.

Nothing.

Whoever the hell that strange person was, he was long gone. I could have stood there and contemplated the whole situation further, but I had a New Year’s party to get to. I was just happy to have come out of it with all my appendages intact. Moving away from the garbage can, I brushed the dirt from my jeans and gave myself a cursory sniff. Thankfully the garbage stink didn’t stick to me or my clothes. That’s all I needed, to survive the encounter but to be shunned by Jenny for reeking strongly of decomposing vegetables.

Shouldering my bag close to my side, I looked up to the sky as something white flew passed my eyes. Sure enough, it had started snowing again. At least the dirty piles would have a fresh coat on them for a little while. With a slippery skid on the ice, I twisted to face the opposite direction and ran flat out back to the subway station.